Heading Home...

I've Moved

2010-12-29T05:42:00.000-08:00

I've moved my blog and will not be posting here any further. You'll currently find it at

www.jungle-journey.blogspot.com

instead. Remember the dash between jungle and journey, as if you don't you'll be on another similar blog instead. Looking forward to "meeting" you there.:) -Maria

We see this...

2010-12-16T11:38:00.000-08:00

But then we see this too...

"Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it."
-Helen Keller

An Honor

2010-12-09T21:43:00.000-08:00

“If a commission by an earthly king is considered an honor, how can a commission by a Heavenly King be considered a sacrifice?” -David Livingstone

Jabez Update

2010-12-09T21:36:00.000-08:00

Two months…two hospital stays…an incubator…a feeding tube…painful wound dressings…two blood transfusions…numerous x-rays…countless needles being stuck and re-stuck into his tiny self…untold antibiotics…hospital neglect…caring and concerned staff…pneumonia…discouragement...prayers…praise…love…long nights later………

He’s “home” (i.e. out of the hospital) and healthier!

He’s defied the odds -- being born two months early in his village hut, not having enough milk, being wrapped in dirty rags, weighing 3.2 lbs at one-month-old, suffering from malnutrition and dehydration which left his skin lying in pitiful folds, pretty severe anemia, losing his twin, having an awful open sore on his back which was packed with feces and should have produced a massive infection -- and smashed all grim warnings to smithereens! Will you say praise the Lord? I do not believe I’m stretching it to say he’s a miracle.

At his last check-up he weighed in at a whopping 5.8 lbs, having gained 2.6 lbs since we first got him. I must say that the weight gain suits his little frame quite nicely and it’s such a joy to watch his little cheeks begin to grow chubby.:)
Despite all his improvements though, the doctor insists that he’s still much too fragile to travel with, much less return to the border area. She says that he has only about 1/10 of the immune system a normal baby would have. And he’s still battling. The pneumonia has not completely disappeared from his right lung and he’s right now developing a worrisome cough. He also has developed inguinal hernia (more common with preemies) which he will need surgery for in three more months. (They have to wait ‘til he’s six-months-old as it would be too dangerous to operate right now.) None-the-less, the weight gain is exciting as well as the rest of his development. He can hold his head up pretty good on his own as well as supporting his own weight on his legs, not to mention those smiles!:)
So this leaves me still up here in Chiang Mai. After his discharge from the hospital we stayed with wonderful missionary friends in the area for a couple weeks, but, as we’re looking at a more long-term stay (the doctor would like him to at least get up to 5 kg) of possibly several months, at least on and off, I went ahead and rented a simple little place which is nearby. I will have to return to the border for several days this next week so it’s a big blessing to have friends that I will be able to leave him with.
And as to an update as to what’s happening down at the children’s home and school, that will have to be another blog.

Living By God's Math

2010-12-09T21:32:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading the little book The Prayer of Jabez by Bruce Wilkinson which someone gave me recently (after hearing that I named our baby Jabez they thought it vital that I should read the book.) This part of it really stood out to me. It’s speaking about the phrase in his prayer, “…and enlarge my coast…” Seeing the first equation below, I realized how much I tend to think that way. I mean it makes sense. All of that should limit me or at least influence what I do in life, right? Or maybe not.

“Whatever our gifts, education, or vocation might be, our calling is to do God’s work on earth. If you want, you can call it living out your faith for others. You can call it ministry. You can call it every Christian’s day job. But whatever you call it, God is looking for people who want to do more of it, because sadly, most believers seem to shrink from living at this level of blessing and influence.
For most of us, our reluctance comes from getting our numbers right, but our arithmetic completely wrong. For example, when we’re deciding what size territory God has in mind for us, we keep an equation in our heart that adds up to something like this:

My abilities + experience + training + my personality and appearance + my past + the expectations of others = my assigned territory.

No matter how many sermons we’ve heard about God’s power to work through us, we simply gloss over the meaning of that one little work through. Sure, we say we want God to work through us, but what we really mean is by or in association with. Yet God’s reminder to us is the same one He gave the Jews when they returned from captivity to a decimated homeland: “Not by might nor by power but by My Spirit, says the Lord of hosts” (Zechariah 4:6).
Our God specializes in working through normal people who believe in a supernormal God who will do His work through them. What He’s waiting for is the invitation. That means God’s math would look more like this:

My willingness and weakness + God’s will and supernatural power = my expanding territory.”

“And Jabez called on the God of Israel, saying, Oh that thou would bless me indeed, and enlarge my coast, and that thine hand might be with me, and that thou wouldest keep me from evil, that it may not grieve me! And God granted him that which he requested.” 1 Chronicles 4:10

“As God’s chosen, blessed sons and daughters, we are expected to attempt something large enough that failure is guaranteed…unless God steps in. …For the Christian, dependance is just another word for power.” Bruce Wilkinson

"...although that was the shortest..."

2010-11-29T20:55:00.000-08:00

"God did not guide them by the road towards the Philistines, although that was the shortest;... God made them go round by way of the wilderness towards the red sea."

Exodus 13:17-18

Go Back!

2010-11-23T04:35:00.000-08:00

If you've had an interest in the LMT project, scroll down a couple posts back to see the two posts entitled Backpacks & Supplies and Graduation. I startled the titles several days ago, but I was just able to upload the pics and finish them.

:)'s

God's calling = His enabling

2010-11-21T03:38:00.000-08:00

Who am I to charge God with having something more "exciting" in store for my life? What's my purpose in life anyways -- to serve God, or to hound after adventure, experiences, and adrenaline thrills? And exactly who do I have the audacity to think that I am... to venture to think that the plans of my creation are what my Creator created me for.

Words of recent rebuke to myself from my journal. God has spoken to my heart giving me a new vision for service - one that may require a more long-term commitment and that goes completely against anything I have ever envisioned myself being involved in. (Although I would have fully supported anyone else's doing so.) All of a sudden I could hear the thoughts of my heart for what they were and I was so ashamed of myself. Me questioning God as to if this is really what He would have for me as I was meant for more "adventurous" work. Yeah. Sad.

You see, I love adventure. And I knew that because of that God made me to work flying as a bush pilot in Alaska...or I should have adventures as a backpack medic in the jungles of Burma...or at least do medical relief work in Afghanistan...and, if not that, God certainly made me to be a paramedic on the streets of some busy city in the States, there for others in their emergencies... That's how I would serve. Right? I mean of course! Yes, without a doubt! Because God would want me to be happy! And He knows I couldn't be happy doing something that's listed as more "boring" or domestic in my book.

Or couldn't I?

What I now know is that - wonder of wonders! - I could. And I couldn't only just be happy. I could be exuberantly joyfully happy. If that's what my Father wants.

After all, His calling is His enabling...

Update: Jabez Daniel

2010-11-17T08:31:00.001-08:00

So our little Jabez is 2 months old already and grows cuter daily (it continually baffles me as to how that really works, seeing as he's already about as cute as cute gets!):) According to the best I can figure, if Isaac and him had not been two months preemie they should have been born last Sabbath. He's currently 1.015 kg (or 4.4 lbs), having gained over half a kg since when we first got him. And incredibly enough, considering the size and depth of that thing, his pressure sore has pretty much completely healed!
Despite his improvements though, they re-hospitalized him up in Chiang Mai this last Sunday. He was diagnosed with severe anemia (worse than before) and pneumonia. After another blood transfusion he's doing much better and it looks as if he'll be discharged soon.
He's a really truly miracle!

Graduation

2010-11-17T08:30:00.000-08:00

Sunday dawned bright and clear as usual, but for me a special day, no less. The graduation for our LMT students together with presenting them with their backpacks and medical supplies which they have worked so hard for. While this had been to me a very special project, I was more than ready to let the load of it roll off of my shoulders. It's been a big learning curve for me and I'd love to see it happen again. A big thank-you to everyone who helped out along the way! Not to mention our Eureka youth class who worked so hard for this! Here's just a couple pictures that show a small piece of the fruit of your labors. I wish you could have been there to see the smiles on their faces! And, no, regretfully, Jason's specialized do-it-all surgical scalpels were not part of the presentation.:)

You may notice that their is only seven students in the picture rather than nine (the number we had purchased backpacks and supplies for.) It came as a real blow to me to learn that right at the end of the class, in my absence, two of the students left our school. But God's in control of that. At the same time as I was so disapointed, in a way I was almost relieved too as the two who left (voluntarily) were my two students that I was really struggling with at times (one seeming entirely unmotivated and the other overly self-confidant.) Right now all I need is two dedicated students to fill in the gap. Hopefully I'll be able to work more one-on-one with them.
Nonetheless, it was a very special day. We had prayer and a couple of small speeches in which the students were admonished to ultimately rely on God in any situation they may face and to use prayer at every opportunity. They were then presented with the backpacks and we had a meal of fruit, milk, and cookies (real treats) for celebration.
They don't want to be finished. (How I love them! Motivated students like that are so much fun!) They'd like to continue learning with more random classes when possible. I'd like to see that happen. Now I just need to get my act together and do it. Hopefully it will happen after things are more settled with Jabez and I return again.

Backpacks & Supplies

2010-11-17T07:16:00.000-08:00

This would be all the backpacks and supplies for our LMT students (supplies including: stethoscopes, bp cuffs, hemostats, scissors, thermometers, salbutamol, paracetemol, bags for medicine, and even instant hand sanitizer - a free gift from a pharmacy where I often buy medicine!) which the youth class from our home church took on as a special project and donated all the money for.

Now this was a fun - picure time! Finally getting to see it all together!

Jason happened upon the fun just in time to add his special implements of sorts to the assortment. He likes to think of it as his special part to play in all of it - yes, that would be his specialialized do-it-all surgical scalpels? which incidentally come in varying shapes and sizes. Possibly a bit rusty, but none the worse for the wear.:)

Look ready to go? A Bible and maybe some rice thrown into the mix and it would appear so!

How do we say thank-you? God used you to turn this dream into a reality!:)

2010-10-31T20:50:00.001-07:00

Note: I'll do my best to have the now outdated pictures and an update of the LMT graduation up shortly. Everything with the twins and our hospital stay successfully turned my world upside down (in a nice kind of way...) and all of a sudden all other commitments have paled in comparison.:)

2010-10-31T19:59:00.000-07:00

I need to appologize for not keeping everyone updated. I'm sure the word probably already got out to many that Baby 2 (named Isaac Nathaniel) didn't make it. Despite my heart breaking over the situation with him, there is still joy as his brother, Jabez Daniel, has a strong will to live and is, no doubt, getting stronger with each day. After nearly two weeks in the hospital, they just discharged this last Tuesday (Still fighting a fever and having just hit a whopping 1.68 or so kg!) His pressure sore is healing nicely. He still needs prayers as our situation for caring for him is far from ideal...
When it comes to describing him, precious would be an understatement and others assure me that it's not simply my prejudice that assures me of this. Especially since he's in my lap at the internet cafe right now and I just looked down in time to see him smile!:)

2010-10-14T20:46:00.000-07:00

10/14/10
Please pray for Moenuh (Baby # 2)! While Moesuh seems to be improving, Moenuh is in more critical condition. They transported him by ambulance this morning to the NICU at the Maesot hospital. He has an ET tube in now and they transported him so he can be on a ventilator. The doctor thinks it's pneumonia. It hurts to not be able to be with him (I had to stay here in Metta with Moesuh). Jason will try to see him today and hopefully I'll have an update later.

Moesuh and Monuh (i.e. Baby 1 & Baby 2)

2010-10-14T20:18:00.000-07:00

Monuh, yesterday with his feeding tube in.

The sores on their legs, ect. are definitely looking better!

Moesuh! He makes the half-sized bottle look big.

Moesuh's pressure sore. It's looking better! (Please forgive me if these are too disturbing to anyone...)

My personal favorite picture.:)

Baby 1 and Baby 2

2010-10-14T00:26:00.000-07:00

I was right in the midst of my delectable rice supper last night when Thara Ehgnyaw came breezing in the door and proceeded to tell me that there was a family who had a child they couldn't care for and would like for us to care for. Could we take it? My immediate response was, "Yes!" before calling him back to add, "Uh, well...I guess I really should ask Emily." To my surprise (considering the burden she already carries with our five) she also had an almost instantaneous positive response. Before we knew it our perspective child was actually one-month-old twin boys. *gulp*
Were they healthy?
Yes.
Did they have both parents?
Yes, but the mother didn't have milk for them.
An hour later found me in a villager's truck (our's currently being broken down and at the mechanic's shop in Maesot) and headed toward the mountain village where the family lives.
Now generally mother's have nine months or so notice to the impending arrival of their baby. It's a weird feeling to have had about an hour more or less to assimilate this news and to be sitting there still trying to grasp the complete significance of what's really happening here, but yet completely aware that your life will never be quite the same again. Scared to death and yet so thrilled...
Grasping for more information - any information - I questioned again as to if the babies were healthy. "Yes, they are." That's all I was getting. More probing, "Are they thin?" Again, "Yes."
That was it.
In my mind's eye I saw two cuddly and cooing little bundles.
But what was that?
As we approached through the dim light of our flashlights I saw a woman standing at the bottom of the bamboo ladder leading up to the small hut with a small roll in her arms. A baby? No, it couldn't be. But...that looked like a head, if a ridiculously minature one.
My heart sank. Nothing had prepared me for this. The babies were obviously in bad shape. It was all I could do to sit still, smile pleasantly, and listen politely to the chatter around me when all I wanted to do was grab up the little things and run as fast as I could away from here and to a place where we could give them a chance at life. At my astonished inquiry as to their real age I was firmly assured that they were indeed one-month-old. {I later learned that they were born at the family's hut 2 months prematurely.} Never had I encountered anything like this before.
How can I even describe... The best comparison I could think of would be to a little naked baby bird. They're skin was draped pitifully in loose, dry folds over their so minature little frames. Obviously dehydrated as well as malnourished.
Mercifully, we did leave shortly. I felt so bad for Emily and Jason who were waiting expectantly at the house, with even less warning than I had had. There is really no way you can view a pitiful little thing like that without some level of shock.
At the family's hut in the candlelight I'd gotten a quick preview of what lay beneath the material they were wrapped in, just enough to know it was bad, but nothing had prepared me to uncover one of them and discover the most awful hole in his back, a pressure sore from neglect. It didn't take us long to decide that they needed to be in the ER as quickly as possible. So we rushed off in Bradley's truck, Tharamoo Gayle with one baby and me with the other.
At the hospital they insisted that they needed to have a mother's name for them and as I didn't know the mother's name the doctor asked if they could put me down as the mother. So the little things are currently labled "Maria's baby 1" and "Maria's baby 2."
As expected, they were admitted. I heard from one doctor that their stay may be over a week and from another that it could be four weeks.
Today they weighed in at 3.2 lbs. Just this afternoon they put them in incubators in the nurse's station, leaving me feeling truly helpless. One of them isn't sucking like the other one and has a feeding tube in. It's so hard to just have to stand there and watch it all.
They're truly a miracle right now and I'm believing that they'll be a miracle next week!
They're so precious! I'll do my best to have pictures on soon.

2010-10-09T21:53:00.000-07:00

Let the little children come unto me and forbid them not?

2010-10-09T21:35:00.000-07:00

What comes to your mind at the words one thousand children? Yes, numeral one-zero-zero-zero.
Do you see some kind of mega-sized school playground milling with happy kids? Or an auditorium full of eager and expectant little faces? Or do you think of a cozy town with each house full of content and wriggling little beings gathered around the kitchen table? Or even some orphanage somewhere feeding and caring for all the ones who have no homes? Of course you hear noise and laughter. You see smiles and little sticky hands. You feel warmth and cheer.
Or do you?
What if instead you think of one thousand children huddling together in the jungle. Due to the political unrest and fighting they’ve had to leave their homes and families - if they had homes and families. Enough food? Clean clothes? Warm blankets? Not likely.
Several days ago we were very seriously informed that within 1-3 weeks we can expect to see around one thousand children arrive here at our school.
One thousand children
Right now they’re supposedly across on the Burma side of the river that's beside us hiding out in the jungle preparing to cross. And we’re told that none of them want to go to the refugee camp. They all want to come to school here.
How can we possibly take them, or even a fraction of them? And yet how can we say no? It hurts my heart to think about it.
Let the little children come unto Me...
We’re supposed to be His hands and His feet. What if they would never get another opportunity to learn to know God?
We’ve been firmly advised to send them away. That we can’t take them, already being maxed out. “You can’t save the world.” I didn’t like that. At all.
The fact of the matter is that we may not be able to feed them – but God can. We feel like we need to at least take in any orphans… What’s wisdom? What’s love?
Please pray for us!

CPR Training

2010-10-02T21:13:00.000-07:00

The beginning of class out on the porch in our babies' "play-pen." Bamboo is awesome!

Pulse is absent...

The boys in action.

In the absence of "dummies" we thought to use the more realistic ones...;) Actually, we had a couple of rice bags to practice on, but they didn't seem very enthralled with that option. They preferred trying it on eachother. I just had to do my best to impress very deeply upon them that we were playing here or they could really have inflicted some damage.:)

That was a fun class to teach. They're amazing kids! Several weeks ago now (while I was gone) two of my best students left the school, which left a big hole in our class. So we pulled in two more, a boy and a girl, bringing the number back up to 8 again. Then the next day I arrived at class only to be asked to please let another one of our girls join. How could I say no? So now there's a total of 9 students. I was concerned that they wouldn't be able to understand as well or catch up with the others, but so far they've been excellent and I'm very glad to have them in the class!
Another big blessing has been to have Tharamoo Gayle back at our school for a little while. This last week she's done the majority of the teaching for them. She's been focusing on the a & p portion of it and I'm so glad for them to get a much better foundation and understanding of that.

LMT Training

2010-10-02T20:11:00.001-07:00

Here's a post that I've meant to put up for months. I appologize for not giving an update on this sooner.

Quite a few months ago now I posted about my plans for training some of our students who were interested in doing medical work. I mentioned that I'd like to be able to at the end of the training give each of them their own backpack with basic medical supplies such as stethoscopes, bp cuffs, thermometers, otoscopes, ect. so that they could return to their own villages (some of their villages are deep into Burma where there is no access to medical care) and help their people.
When I wrote that it was simply a dream I had and something I hoped to be able to do, although I didn't know where the funds would come from for something like that. I hadn't even thought that far yet. Neither did it even occur to me that there might be someone out there who would have it in their heart to take that on as a special project to raise money for. Well that's exactly what happened! To my immense surprise and excitement (not to mention the students!) some friends from our homechurch wrote and told me that the youth Sabbath school class would like to make it their project. God really does care about the little details! They've done exactly that! These last few months they've gathered over $800 dollars for the project. Which is more than enough to provide backpacks, stethoscopes, bp cuffs, thermometers, otoscopes, and instruments for suturing.
Last week when I was passing through ChiangMai on my way to Laos for my visa trip I was able to order most of the supplies and then had just enough time on my way back to pick them up as well as find backpacks and get the suturing supplies. It's been so much fun putting everything together. It will be a very special moment when the kids receive them (hopefully either this week or the next one)!
I want to say a huge thank-you, both on my part and the students, for making this a possibility! It really blew me away!

Here's some pictures of a few of our students:

This is SawHaGay. He's 16 and is an excellent student.

Nuklok at her baptism last year. She went ahead and chose to be baptized although her father told her he would disown her.

SayMuOo,15, is the youngest medical student. She does a very excellent job and is a very willing learner.

Nickotoo is 17.

2010-10-01T02:48:00.000-07:00

I've had probably 5+ blogs on my heart recently, but life isn't exactly slowing down... And sometimes when you're given the choice between breathing or writing a blog, well...

On Sunday we said goodbye at the bus station to the rest of our family, attempting rather unsuccessfully to keep tears at bay. They've arrived safe and sound at home. And there's no snow yet, or so I hear! Poor Josiah must be crushed!

No sooner did they leave than I committed my first big boo-boo while attempting the feat of coaxing money out of the ATM. I mixed up the passwords. Big no-no. If you don't believe me just try it. The ATM informed me that the account had been closed. To say that I was thoroughly mollified and crushed to itty-bitty tid-bits would be an understatement. I should explain that when an account has been closed there's nothing you can do except appear at the bank with both account owners and there passports. And both of those account owners and there passports were sitting safely on a bus and well on there way to the Bangkok airport. For just an instant we entertained the idea of attempting to beat them to Bangkok and meeting up in hopes that there was something they could do, but it didn't take long for our better judgement to prevail realizing that they already had a two hour headstart on us. There was nothing else to do but wait and pray. Pray I did! I struggled and I struggled. It felt almost as if anything that could have gone wrong that day did. How could I have messed things up so quickly? I prayed for a miracle and a faith that could stand... The next day when we returned I was at peace. The ATM card worked like a dream. I could do little else but run up to the bathroom and fall to my knees. This was my miracle. I needed to see that. I shouldn't have, but I did.

It's an amazing comfort to know that God's got us right in the palm of His hand!

2010-09-21T23:51:00.000-07:00

Emily's pretty talented like that...:)

Waiting On the Lord

2010-09-17T20:58:00.000-07:00

So I found myself struggling again last night. In my heart I said, "God, it's been 10 months........"
His answer?
Abraham waited 15 years for the promise of Isaac... Moses' wilderness experience lasted for 40 years... Joseph, was innocent, and yet he was not only sold into slavory, but got to sit in a dungeon for years... David had the promise that he would be king and yet he certainly wasn't seeing it happening as he spent years running for his very life... Or what about my Son Jesus as he worked in His father's carpenter shop? Daniel in Babylon? Elijah in hiding for 3 years?............

I mean just think of Moses with his transition from the life of a prince to a simple sheep herder way out in the middle of nowhere. Think of how traumatic that must have been! We're told that he was a successful millitary leader and a favorite with the king and the nation. He had been accustomed to receiving praise and flattery. His heart burned with the desire to deliver his people and he believed that he could do this and then - bam! - he finds himself out herding sheep.

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eales; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." Isaiah 40:31

The key word in this verse is obviously wait. It's the condition to the promise. From the way it puts it, if we don't wait on the Lord we will never have the strength of the Lord.
This subject is very near and dear to my heart right now. For a while it seemed as if everywhere I turned, everything I read, and even in the songs I heard, the word wait, as in waiting on the Lord, would jump out at me and catch my attention.
I was struggling with feeling extremely discontent. I felt like I was in a "holding pattern." I felt trapped. Then as this was drawn more and more to my attention I began to realize that sometimes God gives us a season in our lives - a season that often we would think of as "dry" - a season for waiting.

Wait:
-To stay in place in expectation of
-To look forward expectantly
-To be ready and available

Hebrew translation: Wait = Qavah
1) To bind together like a twisted rope
2) Look patiently
3) Hope, expect, look eagerly...

Actually the word qavah has both a literal and a fugurative meaning. The literal meaning is to bind together like a cord, while the figurative meaning is to wait, to hope, to expect.
What does a rope have to do with anything?
You make a rope or cord by twisting and weaving (binding) together thin strands or threads which make up the rope. The more strands that are used in making the rope, the more strength is has. There the word strength is again. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, "...a cord of three strands is not quickly broken..."
A piece of string cannot take much weight because it does not have the strength because it is not made of as many strands. A piece of rope though can lift hundreds of pounds because it has many strenads in it. When a rope lifts or pulls a load it stretches a little while it is working. As it stretches, the individual strands are pulled closer together. While this "stress" is on the rope the individual strands work together to lift or pull the load. No one individual strand does all the work. If it did it would break. A ropes strength comes from all the strands working together.
The literal definition of qavah implies strength through numbers. As was already mentioned, the more strands in your rope, the greater its strength. Just as a rope's strength comes from being made of many strands, so our strength comes from being united with Christ. The "rope" of our lives gains strength by being twisted, or woven, or bound together with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
A rope's strength remains constant even when it is not being used. When a rope is not being used, what is it doing? Waiting. It waits for its owner to put it to use. When the rope is attached to the load, it draws its strength from all the strands and goes to work.

Some "strands" that are needed in our lives:
-Trust
The 2nd most frequently used word translated "wait" is yachal. The KJV sometimes translates yachal as trust (Is. 51:). When you completely trust someone you won't be afrid to wait for them. Neither will you be afraid to let them have your hopes, your dreams, and your future....
-Patience = the willingness to suppress restlessness when confronted with delay.
Psalms 40:1
Think of it like a desert. Patience is our journey for a season and hope is our water during that season. We must have both to arrive at our destination.

But most translations of the Bible choose to translate qavah figuratively instead of literally. To wait, to hope, to expect....

1. Wait

I regress to the examples I began with. Abraham, Moses, Joseph, David....
Going back again to Abraham waiting for the promise of Isaac: Genesis 12:7, 15:5,6
He believed. In chapter 16 Abram grew tired of waiting and followed his own understanding... In chapter 17 we see how at Abram now - at 99 years old! - is still waiting on God and God renews His promise to him. Think of how he must have felt... He still had to wait another year for the fulfillement of the promise. His time of waiting lasted 15 years!
What do you think was God's purpose in making Abraham and Sara wait rather than giving thm what they so desired (and even what was His will for them to have) right away?
Think about it! Almost all the great men in the Bible that come to my mind had a period of waiting in their lives. Even a time of miserable waiting... But it was exactly that that turned each and every one of them into the men that they became.

When a potter has completed his work he will set the piece of work on a shelf, waitng 'til he's certain it is dry. If he puts it in the kiln before that point it will crack or come apart due to the moisture inside.

Read Matthew 25:1-13 about the ten virgins. They were supposed to be waiting. They were expected to wait. With their lamps trimmed and burning, no less!
There's only 2 choices in the waiting process - to be faithful or unfaithful.

We tend to put a negative connotation to waiting. I mean who likes to wait? We live in a world where so much is instant.. We don't like waiting. In fact, often waiting is what we allow to add stress to our lives.

But waiting doesn't mean inactivity or putting our lives on hold. We need to actively carry out our responsibilities and serve in every way we can where God has currently placed us.
Think of a mountain climber who's trapped on a ledge in fog. His rescuers lower a rope to him - he can either lie there and wait for them to come down and tie it around him, or he could talk to them, follow their instructions, tie the rope to his harness and wait for the order to start climbing up.
Hebrews 4:11 "Let us labor together to enter into that rest..."

Lamentations 3:25 Waiting involves seekng the lord.
How do we seek Him?
-Time in Bible study
-Time in prayer
-Time in meditation - on who God is, what He wants to do in us and through us, as well as examining our motives, actions, values, and priorites...
Often waiting is what lease us to soul-searching.

Ecclesiastes 3 talks about seasons in our lives. There's a time to plow, a time to sow, and a time to reap, but they're never done at the same time... God's trying to grown a spiritual harvest in our lives, but that takes time and our cooperation in doing the right things at the right time.

Reasons to wait on the Lord:
1) Because of who God is and what He's able to do!
Jer 14:22
Ps. 62:1-2 and again on 5,6

2) Because of who we are and what we are not able to do!
Proverbs 14:12
Jeremiah 10:23

2. Hope
To wait we must have hope... Do you wait when there is no hope? What are we hoping for? Sometimes we choose the wrong things to hope for simply because they appear to be more present, more tangible, and more responsive to our needs and desires.

Hope - looking forward to a favorable end with expectation and confidence - I like that word confidence.:)

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." Jeremiah 29:11
Romans 8:25
Galations 5:5
Psalms 130:5
Hebrews 11:1

3. Expect

We can expect great things from God!
Psalms 34:8
Psalms 18:30 "...His way is perfect..."

There's a general promise: "...Those who wait...will renew their strength..."
But there's also 3 specific promises:
1) "...They shall mount up with wings as eagles..." You could think of this as the ability to rise above the problems and difficulties of life thorugh the strength that a relationship with God gives you.
2) "...They shall run, and not be weary..." The analogy to running becouse of the stress involved would look at the strength God gives us to handle particularly stressful situtions in life.
3) "... They shall walk, and not faint..." Walking portrays our everyday life.

"Hast though not known? Hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? There is no searaching of His understanding. He giveth power to the faint and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." Isaih 40:28-31

Note: This is way long, I know. That's basically a variation of a speech I had to do during our training program last month. I was delighted to finally put into words a little of what's been on my heart for some time. I should mention that not all of these are my words. Quite a few of the ideas and illustrations came from various authors who wrote on the subject on webpages and discussions that stemmed from that.

Our Kiddies!

2010-09-14T21:46:00.000-07:00

Ning-ih enjoying his rice when he was just beginning to eat several months ago.:)

Since then we've made sure that he's had a bit of assistance...

Ning-ih, Josiah, SawGwihLee, JooJoo, MeMeWa, MooWaWa.

Worship at the school.

"For I know the plans that I have for you..."

2010-09-14T09:44:00.000-07:00

...says the Lord.

It's always been important to me to have plans for my future. In fact, I think I nearly always have, and although through the years my plans altered slightly from when as a little maybe 5-year-old I unswayingly decided I would be a nurse to when I was 12 and equally adamant that my future lay in the cockpit of a plane as a bush pilot in Alaska (incidentally, a desire that has never completely diminished...), it was a great comfort to me to be so certain of what I wanted to do and where I was headed. I was completely passionate about what I wanted to do! Never for a moment did I doubt that I would accomplish my dreams! They were all good plans, right?
Let's just say that Thailand did not fit in with my plans. When my family decided that this was where we were going and were determined that we would go together, saying I was dismayed would be an understatement! But still I only viewed it as simply a temporary delay.
Soon it became apparent though that my life was not going to just fall into place and allow me to follow through with my well-layed plans the way I'd hoped.
Mercifully, I'll shorten all the ins and outs and ups and downs of the story to simply saying that God had a course in surrender in store for me... It was not an overnight process.
I realized that this was the first time in my life that I didn't "know" where I was going. And I didn't like it. At all. I felt as though I'd lost my purpose.
I had to come to the point where I could understand that God has a perfect plan for my life and that I would never experience it or be anything like the person He made me to be 'til I was willing to trade my plan for His own.
More recently, I was listening to someone speak and in the context of surrender the question was asked, "Is there anything in your life that you can't imagine living without?" I found it deeply disturbing to realize that I instantly knew that there was something in my life that I did feel that way about and and even more disturbing to realize that I knew what it was. I may have decided to wait on God for the right timing when He would open the doors so that I could fulfill my plans, but I still hadn't completely surrendered my plans to Him, accepting that they may not be His. I couldn't picture, or was even sure that I wanted a life without them fitting into it in some shape or size... It took me hours of struggling and soul searching before I was able to view it from an eternal perspective and count the cost, finally giving it completely to God. What a relief to simply let it rest in God's hands!
Shortly after that decision I felt deeply impressed to go ahead and take an online EMT-B to Paramedic course, which I can start over here, completing the vast majority of it online on my own time before traveling to Texas towards the end of the course for several weeks of hands-on practice, testing, and clinical hours.
I find myself thirsting for knowledge... There's so much I don't know and so much I want to know. But, while I have nothing against education in a campus college setting, I don't believe that it's God's plan for me right now to put the rest of my life on hold in order to go spend the next several years of my life in some city somewhere simply for the sake of traditional education.
This way I can continue to serve where God has placed me at the same time as continuing my education and opening up the door for possibilities for greater service in the future.
I don't think I've ever been more certain of having heard God speak to me! Since that day there's been times when I've struggled, feeling as if there's no way that it can happen and not wanting to get my hopes up only to have them dashed... but I always come back to the fact that I serve a God that opens doors that no one can shut and shuts doors that no one can open! I trust that He will provide the funds...
My long-term plans are no more. I still have strong interests and I still have hopes and dreams that I'm looking forward to seeing how God will use... But If you were to ask me what I'll be doing three months from now I'd have to tell you that I'm not certain what I'll be doing three days from now. All I know is that I'm where God's placed me at this moment in time and that this is the next step in my life!

"...Behold, I have set before you an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and thou hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name." Revelation 3:8

2010-09-13T21:51:00.000-07:00

Since I've been mentioning learning to read and write in Thai I thought I'd just put on a few pics of what it actually looks like for anyone who might be interested.

The Thai alphabet - that's not including vowels!

That would be numbers 1-9.
Talk about squiggly lines, curly-cues, and miniature donut holes...

There's some of it a little more put together.

By contrast, this is Karen. Oh, my beloved Karen!:) I wish Thai would take a few lessons you!

It's an awesome challenge and, although it's often easy to get discouraged about it, I love it! The effort it takes is definitely worth it! If you could just see my heart glow anytime I pass a road-sign and am actually able to make out the sounds!:)

"...As having nothing

2010-09-11T07:39:00.000-07:00

...and yet possessing all things."

In otherwords: you may be sitting covered with a recurring and miserable case of hives (stress? allergies?), you may be so completely exhausted that you have to order your body to move, you may not have more than $3 dollars to your name, or at least have enough for non-necessities such as shampoo (not my current condition, PTL!)...
But it's an amazing feeling to realize that you have what really matters most in life! And once you've experienced it it's something you wouldn't trade for the world! How is it that often it takes us "nothingness" to discover what really does matter and that it dosen't take everything we think we need to have it?

In having what really matters I'm specifically speaking of God and having a relationship with Him, but this is a part of a list I made more recently on a more miserable day and have added to as a way to remind myself of Him and just a part of some of the others things I do have and am thankful for (I'm sure some of these you won't understand unless you know me well):
* The love of God!
* Family that cares enough to be there
* Others who I think of as family (you know who you are)
* Children in my life...
* Although "poor", certainly not destitute
* Music
* Choices
* MANGOES
* Inspiration
* Determination
* Diversity
* The word "no"
* The Source of peace in the midst of chaos
* Writing as an outlet
* A desire for more
* People who smile when things go wrong
* Forever and always a child of God
* Today
* That I cannot see the future
* That I can learn from the past
* Purpose
* Adventure
* Fellow adventurers
* An unconventional life
* People who hug
* A growing appreciation for the Bible
* Love for the unlovable
* Toothbrushes
* Mountains
* Wilderness
* Guitars
* Non-Chevy vehicles:)
* FB
* Things not always going my way
* Colors: such as green and sunset orange
* Healing and beauty that can come from ashes
* The occasional glimpses of enduring love
* That life isn't always fair
* Undeserved grace

"...As having nothing, and yet possessing all things." 2 Corinthians 6:10

2010-08-31T23:43:00.000-07:00

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." -Jesus

Another Prayer Answer!

2010-08-29T23:55:00.000-07:00

Last night as I was on the phone with my mom I heard another call coming in and looked down to see that it was my sister calling. Nothing could have surprised me more! Here we thought that she was still possibly without a way out trapped in no-mans-land... (I didn't post about the situation, but some of you may have heard through the grapevine of prayer chains.) In the excitement I yelled to mama that I had to go and hung up to call Emily back, but couldn't reach her so I called mama back to quickly tell her that Emily had tried me only to have her shout at me, "Go! Go!" I tried Emily again finally reaching her. It nearly put me in tears (of joy, no doubt!) We talked and talked and talked some more and later at night when I couldn't sleep I rather sheepishly called her up again. (What else are good sisters for?:)) You'll never know how wonderful it is to be able to call someone up to tell them good morning just because you can 'til you can't...
God is so good! Thank you so much to everyone who's heard of the situation at her location and has been praying! [Please keep praying though for the situation and others who are still there though.]
I'll get to see Emily this evening here in Chiang Mai and, not only that, but today is her birthday which makes it a doubly special occasion! It will be wonderful to have most of our family together again! God is good!

Happy Birthday, Emily! You're courage and adventurous spirit as well as willingness to serve are inspiring... You are a blessing! You are so loved!

For That One...

2010-08-29T01:48:00.000-07:00

"One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.
Approaching the boy, he asked, 'What are you doing?'
The youth replied, 'Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.'
'Son,' the man said, 'don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can’t make a difference, it's impossible!' After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish, and threw it back into the surf.
Then, smiling at the man, he said… 'I made a difference for that one.'”
-Unknown

2010-08-22T00:23:00.000-07:00

Gaw-guy, kaw-ky, kaw-kwud, kaw-kwy, kaw-khoon, kaw-ruh-khun, ngaw-goo, jaw-jun, chaw-ching, chaw-chang, saw-sow, chaw-guh-chuu, yaw-poo-ying, daw-chuh-duh,...
If you were here to listen this is what you would hear me muttering to myself at various odd moments throughout my day. All 44 of them - otherwise known as the Thai alphabet. (I was tempted to complain 'til I was informed that to learn Mandarine Chinese you must memorize some 1000 characters. I decided we don't have it so bad.)
Yes, you guessed right. I am currently a student of the beautiful Thai language.
Although I have lived in Thailand for the most part that I've been over here, I've worked with the Karen people and they're the ones I've been surrounded by and so the Karen language is the only one I've endeavored to learn and put my heart into. Up to this point my complete Thai vocabulary had consisted of about 6 words. I could say hello, thank-you, ask you where you were going, tell you that I didn't want it, say the word rice, and, last but not least, the all important vegetarian. At times when I was away from the border in a larger town where Karen isn't spoken I'd bemoan my linguistically challenged state, but I was never ambitious enough to pursue it. But especially here lately as I've traveled and spent time in hospitals, ect, I've seen the struggle between the languages and it's been more and more on my heart as to how much more useful I could be if I could speak both.
So when I came up here to Chiang Mai for the training and learned that my friends the Haberkams together with Thara BledtJaw (who lives with them) were going to begin Thai lessons I was enthused with the idea and when their teacher, Kru Malee, asked if I wanted to join them my enthusiasm knew no bounds. And so I find myself up to my ears in new words, pronounciation, and all teh other paraphanelia of knowledge that comes with language learning.
All I can think of seems to be languages (hence the blog post.) It's all I can seem to speak of. The poor girls in the dorm where I stay! Everytime they turn around I'm wanting to know what something is in either Karen or Thai. Their patience would rival that of a saint. Anybody who speaks a second language I hold in awed revere and I will plague with questions as to how long they've spoken it, what language they think in, ect.
This last week's been crazy busy with continued classes, mega tests, and now Thai classes as well. All together we have about 8 1/2 hours of classes each day and that doesn't include exercise, study, or work.
Mealtime often finds me with my open book beside me trying to memorize yet another charcter or sound from the alphabet. (Did I mention that that nearly each symbol looks like a child got a hold of a pen and scribbled things that do have a faint resemblence to lines and donut holes and curly cues?) I'm committed to fluency and am praying for the gift of tongues. And so I remain...
Gaw-gy, kaw-ky, kaw-kwud, kaw-kwy,.........

Why Am I Here?

2010-08-20T02:40:00.000-07:00

That's the question that's been on my mind the last few days. Why am I here? As in Asia - Thailand.

I look around me and see people - natives - that are so much better qualified to do the work I've been attempting...
They can speak... they're natural teachers... they understand their people... they're not shy... many know their Bibles better than I know mine... they're not grossly over-sized or disporportionate in comparison and they don't stand out like a lightbulb in the midst of the night... they know how to work better... many are a better representation of health and strength... they're more nimble and have better endurance... many have had the priviledge of a better educational background... And I could go on and on...
Most, with just minimal training, could do the work I attempt much more effectively.
Most of the time anything I do feels like a needle lost in a haystack...
So why am I here? Why has God put me here at this moment in time?

Maybe God placed me here more for my own sake then theirs......?

The picture that comes to mind is that of a butterfly. I feel like a caterpillar going through its metamorphosis. It's struggling to come out of its cocoon, fighting and yearning to be at peace and rest, gracefully soaring with the others. Every movement and bit of progress is a struggle. It feels like it can't do this...and yet by instinct it knows that in order to survive it must go on.
In so many ways that's us. Struggling to get past language, cultural, and spiritual barriers... Our hope being to one day be able to walk, and talk and share the gospel with these people - there's so many who haven't heard.

MeMeWah Update:

2010-08-20T02:18:00.000-07:00

It's past time for an update on MeMeWah.

We're excited to have her at home again!!! She's been back for a week, I believe, as of today. The doctor thought she might not speak, due to brain damage, and we thought that maybe she wouldn't be able to walk either... But she is!
She's still weak and congested, but definitely on her way to a full recovery.
Thank you SO much for the prayers everyone!

Faith

2010-08-15T00:29:00.000-07:00

"Dunn and his family were spending a few days holiday in Colorado in March. Snow and ice everywhere. Near where they stayed were some little trout lakes, covered in ice. One day Pastor Dunn's friend suggested he walk across one of the little lakes. Here's the story, as told by Dunn in his book:

'I've lived in the South and South-West all my life, and the lakes there don't freeze solidly enough (if they freeze at all) to support the weight of a child, much less that of an adult. I promptly relayed these critical facts to my friend and respectfully declined his gracious offer.
Laughing, he said, 'Come on, Pastor, it's safe - and it may be your only chance to walk on the water.'
I still wasn't crazy about the idea, but after more coaxing, I ventured out. Perhaps ventured 'out' is stretching it. I inched my way out not more than a couple of yards from the shore because, unlike Peter, I doubted Jesus would reach out and save me if I began to sink. I kept a nervous eye on the shore and one on the ice, watching for cracks. And I tiptoed, because you weigh less when you tiptoe. You didn't know that?
Anyway, after a brief and nervous walk on the water, I scrambled back to the soild safety of the shore. I had little faith in the ice.
Later, as we drove back to our lodge, we passed another of the trout lakes and as I looked out of the car window I saw a man sitting in the middle of the frozen lake. He was sitting on a wooden crate, hunched over a hole in the ice, fishing! I did a double take at that, feeling foolish as I recalled my timid excursion on the ice.
Now to the point: the man sitting in the middle of the frozen lake had great faith in the ice - right? I had almost no faith at all in the ice. Now which one of us was the safest? He with his great faith, or me with my little faith? Surely the man with the great faith was more secure? The fact is, the man with the great faith was no safer than I was with my little faith. Though my faith was practically non-existent, I was just as safe as the fisherman who possessed great faith.
Why? It wasn't our faith that held us up. It was the ice.
What, then, is the advantage of having great faith?
I'm glad you asked. Picture me on the ice: timid, nervous, afraid to venture out, constantly looking for cracks in the ice, fearing that at any moment the ice is going to betray me... know any Christians like that? Timid, nervous, afraid to venture out on the Word of God, their eyes constantly searching for cracks in His promises, fearing that God may at any moment abandon them. There is no joy or excitement in their walk. That is the life of little faith.
Picture the fisherman: unafraid to step out on the ice, boldly venturing to the very middle, enjoying himself, resting his entire weight on the ice. You have seen a few Christians like that: they boldly step out on the promises of God, unafraid in the middle of His will, filled with joy and satisfaction, resting on the Word of God who cannot lie. That's the life of great faith.
As we drove past the fisherman, I said, 'I wonder where he got the nerve to do that.'
My friend answered immediately, 'Oh, he lives around here. He knows the ice.'
HE KNOWS THE ICE. And that is the difference between faith and no faith, weak faith and strong faith. The Psalmist said, 'And those who know Thy name will put their trust in Thee' (Ps. 9v10)
The secret of faith is knowing God; and the greater our knowledge of Him and His Word, the greater will be our faith.'"

I'm not sure who wrote this or what book it came from, but I like the illustration.

2010-08-09T02:17:00.000-07:00

MeMeWah got her ET tube out yesterday! She's on the mend! But she's not speaking yet and her lungs are so full that she's having difficulty breathing so please continue to pray...

Here's MeMeWah, healthy. She's the one in the red shirt. The others are all "our" kids too - 4 out of the 5.

PTL!!!

2010-08-05T00:42:00.000-07:00

Last night MeMeWa regained consciousness and was oriented enough to nod a few times in response to what was said to her and to grab my mother's hand. This morning she waved at some of our family! This has got to be a miracle!!! The doctor didn't think she would make it. (I did later learn that, although she was in critical condition, she wasn't on complete lifesupport.) They have moved her out of the ICU. The current diagnoses is scrub typhus with brain inflammation. Thanks so much for the prayers, but PLEASE DON'T STOP, she's not out of the woods yet! Even so, God answers prayer! My heart is full...

Urgent Prayer Request!

2010-08-02T23:24:00.000-07:00

MeMeWa - one of the children who's been living with us - was found unresponsive yesterday with a high temperature from PF malaria. They brought her into the hospital and she regained consciousness, but this morning she was worse again - in and out of consciousness - and they were concerned for brain damage and took her by ambulance to the larger Maesot hospital. She's now on lifesupport.
PLEASE PRAY! She's a precious seven-year-old child...

2010-07-27T03:53:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the silence.

At the moment I find myself back up in Chiang Mai for a month-long medical missionary training course. So far it's been busy and especially the last few days have been great! To say there's been plenty of spice to life would be an understatement!:) So far [most of us] have survived through food fasts, a 3/4 night prayer vigil, [a] 5 am morning class, parched grain... not to mention the cell phone confiscation of some, and, worse yet, the knowledge that singing a solo for your fellow classmates awaited any latecomers.....fantastic incentive, I must say - my current record of class attendance being proof enough (kinda...)!:)
We have an awesome doctor from Bangkok as our teacher this week. She's inspiring!
We're focusing on anatomy and physiology right now.
Did you know that if you didn't have kidneys you would have to drink 800 (yes, that's right - EIGHT HUNDRED) glasses of water each and every day in order to keep your body functioning properly? I, for one, decided that I'm thankful for 'em!

I've got to run get ready for class, but here's some food for thought:
"We spend the 1st 40 years of our lives spending our health on gaining wealth and the next 40 years of our lives spending our wealth on regaining our health." Sad and true for many, huh?

At the risk of chasing half my readers away...

2010-07-05T03:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry guys, I wasn't sure what to write and so I decided to put up some pics of one of my more recent suturing experiences, I hope this isn't overly disturbing to anyone.:)

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One of our new students was cutting a banana tree and also managed to cut his finger pretty good as well as a smaller cut on the thumb. It was obviously going to require some stitching.

What you see here is slightly more sterile than it would appear due to the wonderful invention of rubbing alcohol...:/

Preparing to do a finger block. I'm afraid my patient dosen't look quite as enthused as myself.;)

Regretably, there are no pics of the actual suturing process or the finished product, but it took seven stitches and came together fine. GeChaMe, the young guy helping me, was a big help. He is one of our older students who is also a KNU soldier. He tells us he wants to become a doctor. He'll make an excellent one! Gayle was in the area and came and helped too as well as providing her expert advise - so wonderful when we get to have such a wonderful teacher around!:) I just love getting to do these kind of jobs, if you couldn't already tell (although this is only the 3rd one so far)!:)

New Advertising Method for Volunteers?

2010-06-21T08:05:00.000-07:00

Wanna lose some weight? We've got just the plan for you! *insert salesman pitch style tone* No cost. No pain (well, OK, maybe just a little bit a pain, but, hey, as they say, "no pain, no gain," right?) No exercise. And no diet planning shall be required as your appetite shall be sufficiently reduced due to natural causes.
In fact, from our experience we suggest that you may be able to lose as much as 15 lbs in as little as 3 days!
Be advised: Regretfully, our plan may not be for those who possess healthy consitutions and hardy stomachs.
For further information inquire below.

Well, what can I say? Sometimes desperation drives you to do unconventional things...;)

Before rumors spread, I should add the disclaimer that, no, this is indeed not our new advertisement (but I hope you already knew that.) Instead it is concocted as part of the wanderings of a recovering mind.

The Adam's clan (minus 3 and plus 1) has been momentarily struck down by some miserable bug or other. I think we're all, though some still quite sick, in recovering stages.

I hope to soon have more updates to put on.

PTL

2010-06-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

With reference to my last post, we got the bike back!!

Just when it was looking like there was no way... we got word that, yes, it was across the river in Burma (where we had suspected it to have been taken.) There was some negotiating with the people who it was being sold too and at first it sounded like they might not be willing to give it up, but God worked it all out and now it sits safe and sound right back beneath the house.:)

Thanks so much for the prayers!

2010-06-01T05:15:00.000-07:00

I was woken up late last night and informed that the motorbike has been stolen - again.
They took it in the evening from beneath the house while some of us were inside and the rest down at worship. Kinda disturbing...
Please pray that, if it's God's will, we'll get it back. It's very necessary and very irreplaceable at the moment.
Daddy's gone out looking for it and we reported reported it, but it's looking like a lost cause at the moment. It's in God's hands!

2010-05-24T09:41:00.000-07:00

Today...
if I can in some way lighten someone's burden just a bit... if someone can catch a glimpse of hope... if I can be the tool to put a smile on someone's face... if someone can see in my eyes even just a hint of the compassion God has for them...
...every struggle and moment that was plodded through will have been so completely worth it!
May I stop putting limits on what God's capable of doing in my life and those around me.

"Little is much if God is in it..."

Weekend Adventures

2010-05-17T08:26:00.000-07:00

Sabbath morning came as the perfect opportunity to head up to visit the Haberkam's new place in the mountains.
The trip from the school up to their village is about a three hour drive (my speed...:)), and much of that is comprised of lovely dirt-biking style roads with fantastic views! Micah, who was already headed up, served as an excellent guide. I managed to fall over twice, resulting only in minimal damage to both the bike and my dignity.
By the time we made it up we had missed church, but we still attended an AY program in the church building that afternoon, as well as three other worship services in their village and one of the neighboring villages. It was a great day!
I left the next morning and joined up with part of my family down in Metta. It was then that I learned that they had been informed that one of Tharamu Gayle's patients from a village in their area had been discharged from the hospital and was ready to be picked-up, together with her fourteen-year-old daughter who had been with her as her care-taker. Well where the Haberkam's are they don't have cell service, or, that is, unless they hike part-way up a mountain. So, for the most part, reaching them is pretty much out of the question. As far as I knew the last thing they had heard was that it would still be another week 'til she was discharged and so they certainly wouldn't be prepared to come pick her up.
I decided that the only way would be for me to head back up to their place on the bike, taking the patient's fourteen-year-old daughter with me and hopefully reaching their house soon enough for one of the boys to have time to be able to run back down and pick up the patient herself before dark.
(We've been warned to not be out in this particular area at night. They grow very much opium and it's a big drug dealing area. The main danger is being shot at. The police hide out in an attempt to catch the dealers and (I'm told) if they yell "Stop!" and you don't they will shoot. If the dealers yell out "Stop!" and you do they shoot.)
Little did I know, however, that Bradley HAD, as a matter of fact, visited the hospital that morning and made arrangements to return and pick the patient and her daughter up with the truck several hours later. And so off we were up the mountain!
The thought of running back up there by myself didn't bother me at all, but, at least in my book, having a passenger on these kinds of roads poses a completely new challenge. I must say that some of my most sincere prayers were uttered on that trip. Our travels were nearly without incident though 'til just shortly before we got to the part-way resting point where we stop to pour water on the muffler in order to cool it down. It was then that I began to notice the ominous dark clouds looming overhead. Pretty soon the wind gusts began for real. I really began to pray. When things calmed down enough it was time to go for it. Go we did!
Thankfully we made it through the worst of the deep, powdery dirt before the rain really began to come down. Soon we were on top of the mountain with the rain pouring, thunder crashing, and lightning flashing around us.
At this point there weren't many options but to just keep going. I thought we'd soon make it to the beginning of the short-cut that leads down into the Haberkam's village, which we would then walk down as I knew it would be virtually impossible for me to drive down, especially with a passenger, under the conditions.
What I hadn't planned on, however, was missing the turn-off. This mistake, I'd like to think, was due to the weather and my intent observation of the road directly in front of us. And so we proceeded to drive on for maybe the next hour or so. Every now and again we would pass something I was quite certain I hadn't seen before and I would attempt to ask my passenger again if we were headed in the right direction, to which each time she would point ahead and affirm that, yes, we were indeed heading the right way.
At this point the roads had angry little rivers flowing down them. I discovered that driving on powdery dirt during a rain fall is very similar to driving on ice, or at least it is to begin with. Finally as we came to a fallen tree I knew it was time to accept defeat. Attempting to continue to drive seemed pointless. We needed to get somewhere before dark and I had no idea how long the rain would continue. It could be all night for all I knew.
What followed was a great hike through the elements! It goes without saying that flip-flops are NOT the world's #1 hiking shoe and (with nothing else having been on my feet over over six months) I can assure you that neither is it a rainy season shoe. When walking on a slope through water and oozing mud, let's just say that if you were trying to have fun you could easily find some.:)
Around an hour later, I was becoming increasingly aware of the fact that it looked as if I had made a quite poor decision. Up to this point, we'd mainly walked downhill and I was realizing that though it would most likely be the better idea to return back to the bike it would now most likely be at least another hour and a half's hike and, even if we got back, where to go from there...
By this point the rain had almost totally abated. I'd long since realized that I couldn't even hope to be on the right road anymore, but I was really hoping it was another route and we'd make it through anyways. But the chilling idea was beginning to form in my mind that, if this was the long route around, it could be, well, a looong walk.
Now I was really attempting to communicate with the girl, but, with the language barrier, all I was really getting was that this road would eventually end up at the Haberkam's village, but that, yes, indeed! it would be a loooong walk. What I was unable to make out though was if she was saying that it would take us eight hours to hike or if we would make it there by eight o'clock.
I was at a loss! Should we ask to sleep in one of the houses in the small nearby village we'd just passed? I didn't know where we were or just where exactly we were going. All the various tidbits I'd heard about the night-time dangers in this area due to the drug dealers, ect. were running through my mind, but I knew that there would be better times to dwell on that. It didn't exactly bother me to need to hike for hours, but, again, it's different when you've got someone else to take into consideration. The poor girl with me was both cold and tired. Finally, in desperation I turned to her and simply said (as the Karen say), "I look to you."
With a quick glance at the time she motioned that we'd better be on our way and we plodded on.
The slope wasn't in our favor this time. Several exhausting hills later I heard the sound of a motor in the distance. Yes, it was a guy on a motorbike who had somehow made it through the storm. You should have seen my companion's face light up! She stopped him and asked if he'd please take us BOTH with him. And with that we took off for the ride of my life!! And, believe me, I've lived in some pretty interesting places and gone for some pretty interesting rides in my time. Protesting that I could walk did no good. They were intent on me coming with them, though whereto I didn't know. This guy was GOOD! I could never have done it. The one thing he didn't sacrifice on was speed though. Twice we spun around in a 90 in the mud and just about crashed, but then somehow he caught it each time. We never went completely over. I was honestly was wondering if I'd just met her guardian angel or mine.:)
Our driver pulled up to a split in the road and after giving him a heart-felt thanks the girl led me down one of the roads telling me that we were going to HER village and asking if I would spend the night there. This seemed like a miracle enough! There's some fifty villages back in that area and I had absolutely no clue where her village was located, the name, or anything and now we had been brought right by it.
Now it was rapidly getting dark and, not knowing what else to do, I agreed to spend the night. I hoped to get up at 3 or 4 the next morning and make my way back to the bike (I calculated probably a 5-6 hr hike). I thought that, if I could make it back to the bike, I could figure out where I'd gone wrong. Hopefully I would make it back out early enough in the morning that we could get everything straightened out with the patient and everything before word could leak out that I hadn't made it up to the Haberkam's place and everyone would most likely be frantic. I felt awful at the thought of the patient still waiting at the hospital, but there was no use in worrying about that now.
Meanwhile, Bradley and Thara SawBledt (the former principle of the school who's now staying with the Haberkams) were heading back with the mother. After discovering that I had already left with the daughter they headed back to her village while keeping their eyes open for us (and thankfully missing the worst of the storm.) They found the bike and continued, stopping along the way to ask some villagers if they had seen us.
At the house I was given dry clothes and led away to take a shower (I'm sure I was a sight... Red mud. You can imagine.) They offered supper, which I attempted to gracefully bow out of after I caught a glimpse of some small creature with the resemblence to a rat or squirrel being roasted over the fire.
I had been in bed maybe two hours and just drifted off when I woke up to hear Thara SawBledt's voice near me. I'm not sure if anything has ever sounded sweeter in all of my life! Somehow though I felt like a naughty child caught in the midst of mischief. I didn't think I was supposed to have enjoyed this...:) Explanations would come later.
Soon we were back out in the soggy outdoors and walking to where Bradley's nice, big, safe truck was waiting.
After another ride on the now mushy and deformed roads I found myself safe and sound back in the Haberkam's hut. Explanations, a good meal, and back to bed.
It was a great weekend, to be sure, and a nice break from what can be monotony (as if there really is such a thing here...!)

2010-05-14T05:05:00.000-07:00

This was written for personal reflection, but a certain someone was at the right place, wrong time (or was that wrong place, right time:)) and strongly requests that I blog it.

I reflect back on this past year. There's been good, bad, better, and worse. I see growth and blessings. There is also no way to look past the pain and regrets. I think of times that if the was some way I could go back to I would do things differently. And yet I wouldn't trade this year for ten others.

I met people I'll never forget and had experiences I'll treasure in my heart for always. I fulfilled a dream. I learned to acknowledge beauty and to revel in it. I decided that independence is not all it's cracked up to be.
I walked (sometimes more like crawled) through the valley of the shadow... I knew hopelessness. I spiraled to the end of my rope, but then clung to it realizing I wasn't ready to let go. I found Jesus as my personal Savior. I made Him my friend. I begin to understand the meaning of amazing grace.
To my amazement I learned that there are people out there who can somehow love me with who I am. I've also begun to realize the value that God attaches to me. It's unfathomable, yet real all the same.
I've trembled and cowered at the thought of other's rejection. I've stood up bravely to look it in the eye. Often I've found myself to be a hypocrite. Just as often a hater of hypocrisy.
I've realized exactly how much I value honesty. And I desire to have every aspect of my life reflect truth in all its purity. I've questioned anything and nearly everything. And I've begun to accept that many of the answers to my questions lie only in the heart of God.
I realized that in and of myself I am nothing. Without Christ there is no purpose to my life. I've learned to appreciate people who challenge me and push me beyond my comfort zone. As well as the ones who love you enough to tell you what you don't want to hear.
I learned that wishing away something dosen't change it. I discovered a new passion and fulfilled a dream. I was shown that people are what matters. And to set my priorities straight. They're the ones that will still be there when your dreams have failed you. I learned that you'll never regret keeping your promises or making the most of the time that you have. Time waits for no one. It's merciless that way. I learned how important it is to not let even interests your passionate about or a career crowd our the rest of your life. "You may love EMS, but EMS will never love you."
I faced one of my fears. I touched death. I've seen things I'll never unsee. I faced the agony of consequence.
I learned tht happiness is totally unrelated to circumstances. Happiness is, more often than not, a choice.
The lessons are still coming fast and hard. God's teaching me to wait. And to wait quietly. And, no less, joyfully.
I've taken risks, I've made mistakes. I've chosen to love. And I'm determined there's no turning back.
But what I've really discovered this year is just how much I don't know...

I want to say thank-you to each of you who have been part of my journey this past year. Some of you, even by small things, affected my life in ways you'll never know.

2010-04-26T01:07:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago now (actually the first night I stayed in the hospital with Ningih) a little five-year-old girl was brought to the house with severe burns down her right side. She'd been frying an egg in oil when her clothes caught on fire.
Daddy drove her into the Metta ER where shortly she was then transferred to the larger hospital a ways away. Her father had to stay as her caregiver in the hospital as her mother was very pregnant at the time and had her baby just a week later.
He found the hospital procedure for burn patients dvery disturbing though. He couldn't stand to see her in so much pain everyday and felt like they were hurting more than helping her. And so he took her and left for home where he said they would sacrifice to the spirits and use their own traditional rememdies instead.
Several days later the mother came asking for medicine for the child and I asked to please go see her. I hadn't seen her since just right after the accident and I don't know what I was expecting, but what I did see was shocking. I found her lying on the floor in agony, naked, with the large part of her side an encrusted mess with blood and pus oozing from the cracks, her father bent over her dabbing a liquidy, almost clay-like potion (actually the pounded up part of some tree) into the wound with a feather. She was also feverish and barely eating.
If she really couldn't go back to the hospital, I asked if she could at least PLEASE come stay at our house 'til she got better. Surprisingly, the parents agreed, but when they asked the child to go she was wholly uncooperative and no amount of coaxing or pleading could make her otherwise. They felt that since she was the one in pain she was the one to make the decision (much to my frustration, I may add).
I decided to still do the best we could do for her under the circumstances though and to try to make it to her house twice a day. Not an easy job though as her parents didn't want anything causing her more pain.
After the first treatment I returned to find her re-smothered in the clay-like potion. I was told that after I had left the wound started to drain quite a bit (Hallelujah! Mission accomplished!) and that this was distressing to them as they felt that it's not good for the pus and fluids to come out. No, they didn't want any more treatments for her. They would continue with their way. To put it mildly, I was crushed. I felt as though this little five-year-old's death sentence had just been signed. But I knew that I had no choice but to respect the parent's wishes. Must a five-year-old die simply due to her parent's ignorance and superstition?
Fighting my frustration, I decided to make the commitment to keep in touch and come visit (without medicine), regardless.
My prayer was that God would break down their superstitious ways through this, but not at the expense of their child's life and that He would heal her. Even if it was through their attempts.
It was hard for me to accept, but I couldn't deny that they loved their daughter. They were insisting on what they felt was best. Ignorant love is still love.

It's nearly a month later now and last time I visited I found her sitting up out on the porch (Mom faithfully dabbing on the liquidy potion!) and, although she's still at risk for infection, I believe she's gonna make it. Especially her leg, although severely scarred, is nearly healed.
I'm considering this as an answer to prayer. I don't know what good God's going to bring from it yet though. Maybe they just needed to see that we were still willing to be their friends and stick with them through it. Maybe I needed to learn to let go. Maybe there's something to the liquidy potion!?! Whatever the case, I'm thankful for this little girl's life!

I would like to begin adding more pics of various patients occasionally. I know that not everyone can stomach stuff like this though. If anyone really has a problem with this please let me know.

My Day

2010-04-22T08:58:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I hiked into "my" village, Manykee. It was way past time to go as with my being gone up in Chiangmai and everything it had been over a week.
Most of the time now when I go up I have a very full evening of patients (even up to 30!) They're catching onto my schedule and try to make the most of any time I spend there. Generally I don't make it up 'til after five o'clock and I try to be gone by shortly after six the next morning in order to be back down here and ready for more patients by 9 o'clock. So my time is pretty limited.
This morning I hoped to start out before 6:30, but didn't make it as a few patients soon began trickling in. With smiling faces happily back on their ways, I tried for my escape, but I didn't make it further than a hundred feet before meeting another mother with one more sick child on her back. Finally nearly an hour from when I'd meant to leave, I was on my way. (Trying to remember: "Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape."):)
I had an awesome hike back out. Though strenuous, it's exactly what I need to prepare to face another day. An hour's motorbike ride and I was back down at the school. Just in time to begin a typical morning with whatever patients come to the porch.
We began the medical class for the students at noon. It's exciting to have it underway! On top of hands-on work, we'll be meeting three times a week.
I then went to visit a little girl who was badly burned and who we had as a patient several weeks ago (blog to follow.) And then off to Metta with part of my family and my my ever-growing list of medicine and supplies.
Back and in a rush once again, I hurriedly slap medicines into a bag and jump back on the motorbike to go in search of a patient's hut. Earlier we had a month-old baby that I was quite concerned about. They need more medicine. Thankfully, I find them with little ado.
Off to Mawqwee. Only a few patients this time. It's dark for real now.
One more stop at a hut on my way out to check on another baby. This one was not truly in my hands, but I'd been concerned that he might not make it. I was asked to go see him several weeks ago when he was just a week old and I found a very sick littl guy. They now tell me that he's much better. And that's all I need to make my heart smile for the rest of the evening.:)

2010-04-19T11:01:00.000-07:00

What's happening:

We have another new baby. This time a nine-month-old little girl. Her mother was a patient of our's that, long story short, we took into the hospital and was misdiagnosed. She ended up back in the hospital and, sadly, didn't make it. The family is unable to care for JooJoo and asked if we could take her. She's a healthy and active lil' girl with all the appropriate rolls.:) We can't get enough of her smile. When she's particularly pleased with you she'll throw her little head back and simply beam up at you in what we've taken to calling a JooJoo grin.:)

I'd really appreciate some prayers for the LMT training. It's a challenge for me to get it started and I feel like this time I'm in way over my head, but realize that we've got to make this happen.

A friend took the time to teach me to start IV's last week and I've simply been having a blast with it (me and needles just have this thing...) It's something I've been wanting to learn ever since I got bit by the EMS bug, but never had a good opportunity 'til now. All of a sudden I find myself hugely intrigued by random people's veins and am constantly on the look-out for volunteers...so do watch out - a rookie needle jabber is on the loose!:)

This last week we've been up in Chiangmai enjoying some much-needed family time. Life has felt very hectic recently and it's been a treat to just get to relax for a few days.
It was also the Water Festival this last week. If you've never heard of that before, it's pretty much a three-day-long national water fight! With NO mercy! Kids and adults alike roam the cities and line the streets well equipped with water guns, tubs of water, and various dumping devices. The whole city takes on an entirely different atmosphere as the normally quite dignified at large population throw propriety to the wind and fling bowlfuls at you with gleeful abandon.:) Even through the truck windows... Yes, (excluding some of the spiritualistic parts of it) it's pretty much awesome and you will also pretty much be a sopping mess for the next 3 days.:)

Tomorrow will find us up-and-at-it down by the border once again.

Ning-ih on right and JooJoo on left.

Ning-Eh

2010-03-25T23:15:00.000-07:00

Several weeks ago one of the village woman came to our house with her (approx) 8-month-old baby. His condition was shocking and he was obviously sick. She agreed for him to stay with us 'til he was well and stronger. He was so small that when I came down to the house the next day I wondered how many days old he was rather than months. Every one of his ribs stuck out and if you felt his chest it felt like nothing more than skin covering bone. His neck was tiny for the size of his head and he had no control over it. He seemed so fragile that we weren't even sure how to pick him up. His listlessness was also concerning. We'd been giving them milk formula for a while (something we do for a few babies who really need it when the family can't provide it), but the mother's an alcoholic and we found out that instead of giving it to the baby she'd been selling it for more alcohol and some of what she did give him we were told was so old it was thick and brown. Needless to say, he was suffering from diarrhea and vomiting. After staying at the house for a day, things were seeming to be getting worse rather than better, so we decided it was time to take him into the hospital. We also wanted his spine checked out for possible injury - he had bruises and his mom was reported to be abusive when drinking, even to possibly throwing him across the room. The ER jumped on his case and in no time had him on o2 and IV. We were relieved that the x-rays showed no spinal damage! They admitted him which developed into a 5 day stay. Here the hospitals are quite different than in the States and they require a friend or family member to stay as a full-time caregiver for each patient they admit. Well for Ning-Eh there were few options so I, with others giving me breaks sometimes, stayed with him - could be another blog in itself.:) It's a zoo in there... I felt priviledged to get to be with him and I'm afraid I got way too attached. Who wouldn't?
His progress has been amazing to watch! Each little step feels like a huge victory. Learning to hold his bottle. Holding his head up on his own. Flipping over for the first time. Just developing into a healthy, happy and smiley baby.
He's come so far that it's so easy for me to forget how small he still is. Just recently I was in town with him and someone wanted to know how many days old he was. That's a bit exaggerated now, but it still shows that he's got a ways to go.
His mother wants him back, but we're trying to at least delay it for as long as possible. We don't want to keep him away from her, but we don't know how we can see him go back. As well as a severe drinking problem, she appears to be mentally unstable and has seizures. We're trying to help her with the drinking. Mama's intent on at least giving him a healthy reserve of blubber first.:) Please pray, with his best interest in mind, his mother would be willing to consider him permanently staying here, as well as, if possible, his 4-year-old brother.
Here are some pics that show his progress:

These 3 are of the second day he was at our house. The pics don't even really show how small he was.

Progress of a couple weeks ago.

Gettin' a belly.

Today!

Smiley little guy!

He sat by himself this morning and I don't think I've ever been more proud of someone!!!

He looks pretty proud of himself to.:)

LMT

2010-03-23T09:50:00.000-07:00

Things have been in a bit of an uproar around here lately (here as in down at the school.) This last week our amazing nurse, Gayle, left with her sons to go back to the States and when she returns she will be working up in a mountain village several hours away instead. As a result there's been no one else to take over the medical work and I've been feeling asolutely overwhelmed and underqualified. There's three different places now all vying for my attention at the same time - here at the school; "my" village, Manykee; and another village not too far away, Mawqwee, that's been one of Thramoo Gayle's special projects. Oh, but for the gift of omnipresence! Or, better yet, somebody else to help out! (Hint...hint...:))
The last few weeks I've been much more stationary here at the school. A couple weeks ago I spent around five days in the hospital with a baby that needed care and since then I haven't quite picked up momentum yet. Out of necessity, I've been making short trips up to Manykee - sometimes only several hours or less - and basing myself from here. Well, that is 'til last week when my precious mode of freedom and transportation - the motorbike - was stolen. It was taken from it's parking place under the house and someone came across it stashed away beneath a bridge not to far away. Only some mechanical difficulties - the starter was rewired or something - and the license plate ripped off. Should be able to find me putting again by next week or so.:) We were truly blessed that they found it! Especially since we wouldn't have been able to replace it right now.
So...my preference would have been to run away, but I find myself trapped in the midst of all this. Out of desperation, they decided to have a few of the students who are interested in medical work helping out with patients here on the porch. And so I've had a busy last few mornings with a porch full of patients and medic wanabes (they're really amazing kids...)!
This morning as I was in the midst of a cleaning spree of the medical supplies, all of a sudden inspiration hit! I thought to really train the students that are starting to help with the medical work, rather than just kinda letting them do their own thing with a bit of supervision. And thus LMT - LayKlewYaw Medical Team - has evolved. Now don't laugh at me, folks. OK, well laugh if you must. I'm only an EMT with a bit of additional training. I KNOW I'm not equipped for this, and, not only that, but I despise teaching with a passion. But somebody's got to do this and, sadly enough, I just happen to be the only somebody (actually nobody) around. But putting all that aside, I'm pretty stoked about this!
There's gonna be somewhere around 6-7 students. Each student will go through three stages of training - observation, internship, and field work. Each stage will be a certain number of required shifts (a shift being 9-12 in the morning on the porch adn "on-call" for the rest of the day), together with asigned bookwork, various other requirements, and and a test to pass. As an ending reward we hope to be able to set each of them up with their own backpack, and quality BP cuff, stethoscope, basic meds, ect. so that they can venture out to their own villages as able. Hopefully this will be complete in around two months. Hope that gives a sketch of it.
Some of the students have high goals and I hope that someday they can follow their dreams and go to formal nursing/medical school. But for now this is the best we can give them. Please pray for us - this is so more than I can do on my own.

...

2010-03-11T20:32:00.001-08:00

I read this and, especially part of it, nearly gave me chills. It was exactly what I was needing to hear.

"The Lord has given to every man his work. It is his business to do it, and the devil's business to hinder him if he can. So sure as God has given you a work to do, Satan will try to hinder you. He man throw you from it; he may present other things more promising. He may allure you by worldly prospects, he may assault you with slander, torment you with false accusations, set you at work defending you character, employ pious persons to lie about you, and excellent men to slander you. You may have Pilate and Herod, Anna and Caiphas all combined against you, and Judas standing by you ready to sell you for thirty pieces of silver, and you may wonder why all these things come upon you. Can you not see that the whole thing is brought about through the craft of the devil? To draw off from your work and hinder your obedience to God?
"Keep about your work. Do not flinch because the lion roars; do not stop to stone the devil's dogs; do not fool away your time chasing the devil's rabbits. Do your work. Let liars lie, let sectarians quarrel, let corporations resolve, let editors publish, let the devil do his worst; but see to it that nothing hinders you from fulfilling the work God has given you.
"He has not sent you to make money. He has not commanded you to get rich. He has never bidden you defend your character. He has not set you at work to contradict falsehood which Satan and his servants may start to peddle. If you do these things you will do nothing else; you will be at work for yourself and not for the Lord.
"Keep about your work. Let your aim be steady as a star. Let the world brawl and bubble. You may be assaulted, wronged, insulted, slandered, wounded, and rejected; you may be abused by foes, forsaken by friends, and despised and rejected of men, but see to it with steadfast determination, with unfaltering zeal, that you pursue the great purpose of your life and object of your being until at last you can say, 'I have finished the work which Thou gavest me to do.'"
-Author Unknown

Deep Roots

2010-03-11T20:23:00.000-08:00

Have you ever heard the sighing,
Groaning of a tree before a storm,
Heard the scraping of the branches
in the bending of its form?
Have you seen it swayed and straighten,
then be swayed again, again,
Seen the leaves like tiny banners,
whipping, dripping in the rain?
Seen it in its strength and beauty stand
defiant in the blast,
Seen it proud and undefeated when the
mighty winds have passed?

Have you seen a fellow mortal weighted
down with many cares,
Heard him sigh when dread disaster came
upon him unawares?
Have you seen him bear it bravely,
overcoming all his fears?
Seen him turn his face to heaven, gazing
upward through his tears?
Seen his countenance of sorrow change,
and wear the victor's smile,
Seen him stand complete in triumph o'er
the bitterness of trial?

Winds have ne'er uprooted timber growing
deep beneath the sod ----
Strife has never conquered mortals who are
rooted deep in God.
-Byron E Debolt

First Suturing Experience!:)

2010-03-06T21:04:00.000-08:00

It's after 11 p.m. and I've already been soundly asleep for several hours (bedtime comes early here as generally I'm exhausted.) I wake-up with a start at the sound of a woman's voice calling, "Thra-moo! Thra-moo!" from the other side of my mosquito net. It quickly registers that this must be an emergency. They've never called me out in the night before. I recognize the little woman standing outside my room as one of my neighbors. She tells me that her husband has fallen and that he's hurt. I deduce that drinking must have been involved. I had suspected a drinking problem at this house before. My jumbled brain attempts to unscramble as I wander over to gaze with some confusion at my supplies. I'm not prepared with a jump kit. My bad. What to expect? Finally I settle on my trusty stethoscope, blood pressure cuff, 4x4's, and a few other miscelanious items. Emily (who just happens to be visiting me for a few days) and I scurry down the path after the spry little woman. We reach their little bamboo hut and climb up the rickety ladder. I find the man sprawled on his stomach next to the smoky fire. Several miscelanious people sit around the little room. They point out his bloodied hair which upon my further investigation appears to be a scalp laceration that looks like it will require suturing. He also complains of severe lower back pain. And, no, I was not mistaken in assuming the involvement of alcohol. The cramped quarters are much less than ideal, but my EMT conscience doesn't permit me to move him (spinal precautions...) I leave Emily with them and take off back up the hill to get the supplies we'll need. Yikes! What was it that told me to study out anasthesia and some of these kinds of techniques earlier! Back at the hut I spread out the goods and give Emily quick instuctions as to how to be my gofer. I quickly decide that sterile procedure was not invented for situations such as this one. Smoke from the fire blows my way and tears stream down my face from the irritation. I attempt to keep his unruly hair out of the candle that was placed at his head and cut away the hair around the cut as best as I can (I will have razors on hand next time!) and clean up the blood. The laceration is not much more than an inch or so in length, but it looks deep, and semi-jagged, and I can see what looks like some layers or something. Meanwhile, Emily gives me what I need and expertly helps decifer what people are saying ( a lifesaver, especially under the stress!) My man's not making this easy, thrashing his head around just when I think I've got things under control. I take my syringe of lidocaine in shaky hand and with a deep breath (and yelp in Emily's direction for prayers) we do this thing. It goes well accept for when he thrashes again and lidocaine spray splatters my face. To my elation the lidocaine does it's job and things are moving right along here! No sooner do I have his head draped with 4x4's (OK, so sometimes you do what you got to do...) and got on my sterile (YES!!) gloves on, than my patient thrashes about knocking off my "drapes" and sending my alcohol cleansed instruments into rather precarious positions. Just to give you an idea of what I'm working with here, the fire's on one side of the man and I'm leaning over him while squeezed into maybe a foot of working space with the wall crowding me on the other side. The chief of the village leans over from the other side shinging a light for me and, finally, at my frustrated insistance, he helps hold down the patient's head. OK! Here goes my maiden stitch on a real and live human scalp! I pull it through and have the horrifying realization that with the stress of the moment (and lack of practice) I have no clue how to tie this thing. One failed. By this time the anasthesia's definitely wearing off. I fill another syringe and start over. With another plea for prayer in Emily's direction, I try again and to my tremendous relief the tying technique comes back to me. Halfway through I comment (in English) to Emily that I don't believe I shall ever forget my first suturing experience and right at that moment the head beneath me nods. Somehow that got my funny bone.:) I'm praying through it that God will make up for the lack in sterilness as I'm doing my best, but have just about given up. All finished. They voice their heartfelt thanks and even attempted to shove a hundred baht bill (approx. $3) into my hands.
Right now it's 3:19 a.m. and I'm sitting here with my clothes reeking of smoke writing while I let the adrenaline wear off. This was a good experience. I'll know better what to expect for next time and be better prepared!

Sabbath

2010-02-27T08:30:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here right now at almost ten o'clock at night beside a woman with her 4-year-old grandaughter on her lap who's having difficulty breathing. They came as an emergency this evening and it only took one quick listen to the wheezing in her lungs to stop my murmuring. R 60. No doubt about it, it's a nebulizer case. So the treatment's just finished and we're waiting half an hour to decide what happens next. Definite improvement. Don't always get results this quickly. Respirations down to 36 and wheezing is noticeably improved.
I'm back down in the valley at the school for the weekend. Been a busy day. Started out this morning by the arrival of a very pregnant woman. Her vision got blurred this morning and then she went blind, she had a severe headache and was vomiting as well as obvious edema. Needless to say, there was reason to be concerned and Mama and Daddy took her into the OB clinic in the refugee camp about an hours drive away. Turns out she was pregnant with twins and had severe toxemia. They got back just in time to help transport the students back to the school from church and then we're informed that one of our big girls from the school, SawSawPaw, is sick and having breathing difficulty. So I grab a stethoscope and bottle of Sabumol and run down to the girls dormitory. I find a very miserable girl, moaning and crying on the floor surrounded by various students and staff attempting to help. I do the best I can with vital signs and medecine and decide that this is urgent. In short order we're on our way to the Metta ER. After an eons wait (I actually was so exhausted that I found myself a bench and had a nice nap!) we're informed that there is no problem. All it is is hyperventilation from mental problems (yeah, right! - I don't like to doubt the doctors, but I'm not sure... but then I guess I'm biased toward our students and naturally don't like to accept that kind of diagnoses. We'll see...) We no sooner return and I find my comfy mat as I left it and get reasorbed in my book than there is the arrival of a new patient. This time a little girl. I take one look at her and her mother's placid expressions and silently groan. Why is it that people can't only come for EMERGENCIES on the weekends!?! So much for a day rest and relaxation off of my mountain.:) But we are soon informed that our little girl has a fishbone stuck in her throat and that she has vomited blood. I attempt to peer down her throat with the aid of an otoscope and tongue depressor, but to no avail! I clearly am not equiped for this. What continues to astonish me is our little patient's composure. No hystericalness, whimpering, gasping, or throat clutching as we had with our last little patient who had a chicken bone lodged in her throat. I'm truly starting to suspect that it must have been dislodged already and has only scratched her throat. But, no, they assure me that it's there alright and that this particular liitle girl has a reputation for being quite unflappable. So off we are to the Metta ER yet again. The doctor promptly fishes the bone out and in short order we're on our way back again when home base contacts us and advises that we hurry as SawSawPaw's having problems again. Back down to the school I go. She's better this time, in comparison. Moaning and still kind of out of it with dizziness and a headache, but having no breathing difficulty. Kept an eye on her and spent some enjoyable time with the girls in the dorm. She eventually fell asleep and I hope will be better by morning.
So here I am doing the 2nd neb treatment on our new little girl. Here is the sweetest grandmother you could ever hope to meet. She tells me thank-you so much for learning Karen and hearing that makes every painful moment of the on-going learning process worth it. 2nd treatment's finished and, much to my relief, the wheezing's all but gone. They leave with many smiles and thank-you's. It's one of those moments where I know that Im right where I'm supposed to be. I'm not focused on yesterday and I don't know about tomorrow, but right here, right now, at this very moment, I know with a certainty that I am right in the place where I was made to be for this moment in time. And it's the bestest feeling in the world!
On that warm and fuzzy note, it's 11:10(+). Goodnight, folks!

You Know You're a Missionary When...

2010-02-22T21:51:00.000-08:00

You know you're a missionary when...

-> It dosen't even occur to you to use a fork when eating.
-> You can (when the need arises), without blinking an eye, change clothes in front of a roomful of people (there's a technique involved...)
-> You're told you're fat, sometimes several times a day.
-> You can't understand why people need chairs.
-> You call your grandma "Pee-Pee" and your grandpa "Poo-Poo." (No joke! Sometimes the language is hilarious.)
-> Even the married men you know wear skirts.
-> Instead of wondering why people are staring at you, you think it's strange if they don't.
-> You've cheerfully accepted the presence of miscelanious little critters in your food as an excellent source of protein (bye-bye vegetarianism!)
-> You don't know how to sleep with a pillow.
-> Your new name is "White Person" and somehow everywhere you go everybody always already knows it.
-> You've acquired an awesome tan and yet still people marvel at your whiteness.
-> You've been spied at through holes in the restroom walls.
-> Gas for the motorbike's a necessity and toilet paper a luxury.
-> You dream of subs, seven-layers, and snowstorms.
-> Politeness and generosity are a way of life.
-> On good days, you own the equivalant to $15 and you're very possibly one of the richest people you know.
-> You consider yourself to be alright financially 'til you're below $3.
-> You've ever prayed for the loss of one of your senses - smell!
-> You know what it's like to be deaf, dumb, and illiterate.
-> You're current roomates are leggy little beings, dark and fuzzy, about the size of your palm, with the potential of increasing exponentially.
-> You can judge the time before light by how many roosters are crowing.
-> You know that the poorest people are some of the happiest in the world.
-> You've almost forgotten what you look like as you don't have a mirror.
-> If by chance you see another white person, you forget your own ethnical status and join the natives in their cry of, "Look! Look! A WHITE person!" And catch yourself making similar snyde comments as to his tanned whiteness, disporportionate nose, and ungainly size.
-> You've ever come across road workers reclining horizontally across the road while taking a siesta and rather than moving they let you drive around them.
-> Your heartrate does not accelerate even though that vehicle just missed you by a foot.
-> You've decided that a sense of humor is a lifeskill.

"By their fruits ye shall know them..."

Website

2010-02-10T00:20:00.000-08:00

My family just got their website up as of today. Paul Williams put it together for them and we're thrilled with it!!! Just wanted to put a link to it on here.
It's: www.karenoutreach.org

Does Anyone Care?

2010-02-10T00:11:00.000-08:00

This was written by my Mom recently. I asked to put it up on my blog as it speaks better than anything I can write.

Does Anyone Care?

They are huddling in the torrential rains with no shelter, exposed to missing limbs and lost lives from jungles full of landmines.....as little children. They are seeing sights of torture and killing, losing father and mother…..as innocent children. This people, persecuted for over 60 years, they are fleeing, running, hungry, sick, dying…..children.

This is the story of the Karen children—each story is different, yet the same.

Does anyone care?

Along the border of Thailand and Burma, there are towering mountains rising above the Moei River, seemingly endless jungles, and small Karen villages dotted here and there. Along the river are leaf-roofed bamboo huts in small settlements—inhabited by peaceable Karen refugees. There are relatively few Thai residents in these parts of Thailand.

This is in the province of Tak, Tha Song Yang district. Last June (2009), sounds of shelling, machine guns, and landmine explosions reverberated from mountain to mountain. Within a couple of weeks, the SPDC (Burmese Army), together with the DKBA, succeeded in causing up to 5,000 displaced villagers to seek refuge in the only safe place they knew of—Thailand. This is the history of the Karen for the past 60 years—running for their lives; running in fear from soldiers who are instructed (not merely allowed) to rape, kill, and steal; pursued by a government who said ten years ago, “In ten years you will only find a Karen in a museum.”

At this time last year, there was a small school in Burma just across the river from Mae Salit Luang, Thailand. It provided a home and an education for about 120 boarding students. These were children who otherwise would have no hope for a brighter future. They came from varied backgrounds. Some came from caring parents who were unable to provide either food for the empty stomachs of their growing bodies, nor education for their developing brains. Others came who had been abandoned, orphaned, or rescued from an abusive situation. But they all had one thing in common—their young lives had already encountered suffering, hardship, and privation. And they all were in danger of being deceived into seeking a “brighter future” in the cement jungles of Bangkok.

This school is now in ruins. An American family received the children as they evacuated across the river and provided a safe place for the students and their teachers on Thai soil. Recently property was purchased for a home and vocational learning center for these children. The children love this place. It is a lime orchard with mango, banana, lychee, papaya, and other fruit trees. A clear, flowing creek meanders through the property, with pools where the children love to swim. The work/study program has already resulted in beautiful vegetable gardens that the teachers and children are growing together. Although the structures are very primitive, measures are being taken to improve that situation. But for children who are used to seeking shelter in the jungle, at best living in a leaf-roofed bamboo hut, and living with no latrines or sanitation, this is a good place.

Does anyone care?

The children are still being pursued—not by the SPDC, but by misguided NGO and government policy-makers and soldiers under orders. They are still living in fear—fear of the unknown, fear of being sent back into a land mined war zone, fear of having no chance for an education and having to spend the rest of their youth herding buffalo, fear of foraging for food and firewood in heavily land mined jungles, fear of dying from this area’s killer—hemorrhagic cerebral malaria—because of no access to medicine or hospital.

The Thai government is planning to send these children back into Burma; we are told it might be tomorrow, maybe next week. Children from another school, who evacuated at the same time, have already been shipped back, several times returning to what they know as a place of safety and promise, only to be shipped back again.

Our children at this school are family—many of them have attended this school for its 7 years of operation—studying, playing, singing, working, and praying together. The evacuation was the third time the school has had to relocate due to persecution. Must it happen again?

Does ANYONE care?

Where are the children’s rights that we talk about, where are the children’s advocates, who see what the children’s desires are?

How can anyone send children back to landmines, hunger, and fear, especially after they have tasted something else?

Where are the voices, voices to appeal to the Thai government on behalf of little children?

This letter is written as I am keeping a watchful eye on a small girl. She is sick, and we are treating her, with the love and care, medicines and treatment, needed. We are ready at any moment, should she turn for the worse, to take her to the hospital. As I am writing, I am very aware of the fact that many of our students would have died in Burma through this last year had they been sent back to where medical care is unavailable or too expensive for these destitute people.

Does anyone care about the children?

We have a foundation we are under. We have a place where the children want to be, and where they feel safe. We feed them and care for them, educating them to be honest and industrious. We want them to learn about the love of God, and receive academic learning. We are not asking for help in caring for these children. We are not asking the Thai government to cover any expenses. By the grace of God, this last year we paid for all their hospital bills, and for hundreds of villagers’ medical needs and surgeries. We provided rice, food, baby formula, and medicines for the destitute and hungry in addition to the school. A skilled nurse was available to care for the children when sick. We are not asking for a handout. We are only asking to be able to keep the children in a safe, loving environment, where they can enjoy the labor of their hands in field and garden. This is a place where they are safe from child trafficking and the lure of the cities, and free to play together in the orchard and jungle without fear from enemies and landmines.

It has been suggested that we send the children to the refugee camp. Crowded, smoky, dusty, and dirty as it is, maybe many of them would end up somewhere else unmentionable…

Does anyone care? Are there voices somewhere for these children?

Do YOU care?

If you care, what will you DO?

As a postscript to the above: The "crisis" is over for now. The Thai soldiers have not come due to all the protests, but please keep the situation in your prayers. -Maria

Life

2010-01-28T20:37:00.000-08:00

I've been keeping putting off writing another blog. Why? There's so many little tidbits, experiences, challenges... I want so bad to share with the outside world who knows nothing of any of this. But my problem's this: How do you put into words what isn't words? How do I relay to a world a world away these things in a way so they can relate to it?
Walking along a path at night with the flickering flame of a candle for lighting, weaving through huts and various kinds of muck. Gazing up through the silhouette of palm branches at the dusky sky, moon, and stars (one of the absolute coolest sights!), entering a dim little bamboo hut and sitting around a blazing fire with laughter and comfortable companionship. Feeling at one with the people. Accepted as a friend. Those are the good times.
But painting out only the europhoric instances would not be giving you a picture of real life as it is. There are the moments when it feels like I can't go on. Absolutely worn out and exhausted. It's getting late and I still need to cook my supper. The patients continue to trickle in in happy oblivion to my dillemas, giggling about some wanted cough medicine for a cough that I don't hear and I hack away in front of them as I listen to yet another pair of lungs. I want to growl, "You know that some people actually feel sick..." But I don't. All it takes to clear my attitude is remembering why I'm here.
But still the good overshadows the bad by so much! Perspective makes all the difference. I find that just going out for a walk to clear my brain works wonders.
Getting used to things here and settling into a comfortable semi-routine.
As of the end of today (Wednesday), a total of approximately 223 patients have been seen! (some repeats and many that were coming for simple things such as deworming meds, though.) 149 of those have been kids. That's exciting to me. In just a few weeks I'm getting more experience with peds patients than I probably could have in the States in several years.
God's been good to me! So good! So far I'm not aware of any bad effects from treatment, although many times out of desperation I've said a quick prayer and made a wild (though I'd like to think educated...:)) guess or taken a chance. New territory here. I'm learning by trial and error. Goiters, abcesses, malaria, pneumonia, gastric ulcers, ect, ect, ect.
I think God's using this time to smooth down my many 'rough edges.' His faithfulness is amazing!

Prayer of Peace

2010-01-28T20:22:00.000-08:00

Prayer of Peace - Relief & Resistance in Burma's War Zones [English subtitles] from Front Films on Vimeo.

Pics

2010-01-16T21:12:00.001-08:00

All packed for our trip up!

EhKnYaw ready to go.

My new place!

Cooking facilities - it's actually really a blast to cook like that, although I'm still trying to get the hang of the fire. The fire's sure nice on those cold and early mornings.

The new outhouse they just built.

Neighboring houses.

Day 3

2010-01-14T23:16:00.001-08:00

A good day. Not quite as eventful as the last two. A few small victories. Some discouraging moments too. Mostly language bloopers. If nothing else, at least I'm good for amusement! The problem is that I might know I said it wrong, but I'm not sure just exactly what I said. Either their laughing at me or exchanging embarrassed glances with one another (I'll take the laughter, thank-you!:)) Tonal languages. I regress...
The number of patients is definitely picking up. 42 today! Quite a few weren't exactly patients though as they just came for deworming meds - very popular. Asides from that, mostly coughs, tummyaches, and other various aches and pains.
I took a wonderful couple hour hike out to the road and back again this afternoon. So thankful for the opportunity to get away like that. The publicity quickly wears on you. They have no sense of privacy whatsoever.
I'm used to taking my bath in public by now (what they do here - dressed, of course), but not with a direct audience. Well that's just exactly what I had this evening. I was praying for all I was worth they'd find something more interesting to observe. Finally, in desperation, I decided grin and bear it was the best option. I had an abbreviated bath afterwhich they trailed me up back into the house, together with a couple new patients. Incidentally, the house has no doors. They didn't seem to take a hint and I was starting to wonder if they had any sense of propriety at all. Let's just say that we become skilled in such matters.:)
All said and done though, the end of a good day! It's a wonderful challenge and I feel blessed to be here.

Day 2

2010-01-14T22:46:00.000-08:00

I discovered that I didn't have some of the things I need so this morning I went on a medicine run down to Metta. Received new fortification and encouragement via friends from Facebook.:) I ended up being late and didn't get started up 'til close to dark. After a harrowing ascent up the mountain, I pulled in to where a group of guys were playing ball in the field out in front of the old Catholic church that I park my bike beneath. Well the last thing I wanted to do was draw more attention to myself than was already granted. They already eye me with a certain level of amusement, interest, and an undefinable sentiment (pity?). I had to drive around the edge of the field to get to the church. One of the men moved to open the gate for me, allowing me just enough room to squeeze through. It was at an awkward angle and the ground was rough. I endeavored to gracefully maneuver in, but instead I gave it too much throttle to get over a bump and with a rather ungainly spurt we jumped through catching on both the wall and gate and managing to knock a board lose. Now if this didn't turn heads!:) I stumbled away with my dignity at about dirt level. Legs shaking (from the harrowing ascent) I headed down the hill toward the path going to my place. As fate would have it, a small stream blocked my path. Really not a stream though. More like a gooey mucky mire of mud that smells of pigs and chickens. Mr. Murphy was in for the lion's share tonight! When my feet touched the slippery slope, part of me went south and the other went north leaving me down on my knees in the mire, much to the delight of my second audience who were perched on the porch of the hut below me. They chuckled to their heart's content as I retrieved my bags, smile, and dignity from the smelly goo. At this point my flip-flops were so slick they refused to gain any grip on the ground (further adding to my audience's mirth, I may add) and so I trudged off barefoot.
This "nurse" can rest in peace tonight knowing that, if no other good was accomplished, at least she gave out the medicine of laughter in large quantities!:)

Day 1

2010-01-14T21:31:00.000-08:00

Here I am up in Melaki. Yesterday was a long day. I was starting to wonder if we would actually make it, but finally in the late afternoon our little caravan started off. You should have seen EhKnYa's bike! That thing was loaded 'til it could have taken no more. Finally we were beginning our ascent. We made it up right around dusk. I must say that I had strong hopes for a quiet entry. I just wanted to sneak in there and maybe sometime the next day start quietly getting acquainted with the villagers. But that was not to be! I just hate being a gazing stock, but that's just exactly what I am here. "Gullawa! Gullawa! Gullawa!" It means white person and you wouldn't know how tired I get of hearing the word. I tell you, this big white person thing wears on you... Even the cows eye me with suspicious gaze and the pigs have squealed and high-tailed it at the sight of me.
Anyways...the villagers trailed us up to the house and congregated to watch the new gullawa. I took care of a few patients (with great fear and trembling) and a few of the villgers stayed to sit around the fire a while. There's two girls who were asigned to stay with me for a little bit, at least 'til I get the hang of cooking over a fire.
We were up bright and early to the tune of the crowing roosters. 4:32 - I kid you not! I may be many things (not all pleasant), but I assure you that an earlybird has not been one of them. Well if life must be this wayat least I will get to join the exclusive ranks of the healthy, happy, & nice. (I say happy as wealthy is one thing that dosen't happen here.):)
No patients in the morning. The girls took me visiting at several places through the village. I have never had such a morning in all of my life! They took me to one of the girls homes. I don't know if there's a way to describe to you what I'm feeling as I duck into a dark and smokey little bamboo room where a mother and her children sit cross-legged around a fire. I almost feel as though I'm going back to some pre-historic place in time. It quickly dawns on me that the furry and not so little creatures they're roasting over the fire are rats. I see a whole pile of them lying there. The (very normal looking!) mother reaches over and hands another limpid and very dead little creature to her young son on the other side of the fire who spears the thing and proceeds to roast it. He snaps off the tail, popping it into his mouth with apparent relishment. I with my American mindset am horrified and am doing all I can to simply maintain a neutral expression. With great self-control I seat myself nearby and try to act as if this indeed is quite normal. It's almost all I can do to sit there and watch. They ask me if I think rat tastes good. I say that I don't know as I've never eaten one. This they seem to find amusing. They inform me that they indeed are quite delicious. Now I'm a vegetarian. And just one thought of rotting dead animal of any kind entering my mouth gives me the creeps and I certainly think nothing more of rat meat (no offence to any carnivorous readers.:) I had been thinking about how I would respond if I was offered anything with meat in it. But right there at that moment I knew that I had no qualms about saying no.:)
Oh, and I must tell of my first (and last, I may add) betel nut chewing experience.
The next house we visited was much more normal on appearance. We sat around for a long time. I had a great time with the girls and many of the village women and children came in and out. They made valiant attempts at teaching me Karen, pointing to nearly everything in sight and giving it's name. I in turn taught them the English words. Pretty soon they offered me a nut-like little thing with a kind of hull on it. They told me what it was, but I had forgotten the Karen name for betel nut. So I, with the true missionary spirit (it wasn't a roasted rat after all!), received it with gratitude. Pretty soon it started to dawn on me what this was. Now I should say that of all the vile things, on my list betel nut is pretty close to the top. Their teeth are horrible - all black and red stained from it (I'm told this is supposedly the women's aim - the blacker the better.) and the smell nearly makes me sick. Thankfully, I didn't get very far with it though.:) I must say though that it's a pretty sad beginning for the new "nurse" of the village who's supposed to exhibit the most exemplary behavior to all.
And there are the more exciting points of my first day.:)

Melaki

2010-01-03T19:48:00.000-08:00

I found the village I'll be moving to! A friend, Ehknyaw, did some searching for me and came up with a beautiful village up in the mountains that's very ideal for what I'd hoped to be able to do. We went up and visited Manikee last Friday. It's approximately a 1 1/2 - 2 hour drive from my family's house near Mae Solite, although not so far in distance. To get up there you have to climb up a windy road full of tight almost spiral staircase style curves. Finally it turns off onto a dirt path. I'm told you can get a truck up there, but I kinda find that hard to believe - at least without a fight. It was rather exciting just trying to get up there on my motorbike. Honestly, I was wondering if I would make it or not part of the way. But we did! It'll be a fun drive.:) Not sure I'll be transversing it too often in the rainy season though.
The village setting's gorgeous, although also extremely poor, as are most. It's on a hillside. The huts have thatch rather than leaf roofs and there's more palm trees than many places. There's no religious presence in the village that we're aware of besides an old Catholic church and monastery and Buddhism of course. There's an empty wood/tin structure up on posts that will act as residence for me, the water buffalo that resides underneath, and also the clinic.
I'm informed that nobody in the village speaks any English. I think it will be a daunting, but good stretch for me. Thankfully I do have phone service within a short walking distance! Asides from the medical work, they would like for me to teach English at the school one day a week.
Next Sunday is the move-in date! I'm very excited and feel like this is where I'm supposed to be.

New Year!

2010-01-03T19:20:00.000-08:00

12-31-09
It's New Year's Eve and I'm sitting here in the ER. We had a scrawny little 3-year-old girl who came to the "clinic" this early evening still having a sustained high fever from malaria that was diagnosed last week and also lung problems. Poor little mother! If I'd spotted her on the street I probably wouldn't have guessed her to be much more than 14 or 15. She was walking around with both of her kids in slings - one on the front and one on the back. I got to tote around her perfectly adorable little might of a kid (maybe 1) while she attempted to soothe our squalling little patient. We weren't able to take her earlier as we had no vehicle. When it finally returned we were off to Metta with Bradley chauffeuring once again (his 3rd trip of the day - my 2nd.) One the ride in I was reminiscing on this time last year.
Last New Year's Eve I was in Burma lying on my mat on the floor of my bamboo hut listening to what I couldn't decide whether to be gunshots or fireworks. To me it sounded like gunshots and I wasn't sure that they'd have fireworks here. Earlier that day I'd heard someone say that there had been an agreement for the Burmese not to attack 'til after the New Year. Well, now it was New Year's Eve -- and, quite honestly, I was terrified and my imagination was running wild. I seriously considered running over to the guy's hut and asking if we were in danger, but thought better of it due to the time. I settled down with the knowledge in mind that if we would need to escape the guys would know and come warn us. I went to sleep claiming Psalms 91. Come morning, at breakfast I asked one of the guys about the sounds of the night only to be asked "What sounds?" Apparently he hadn't even been awake to worry about it. Must've been the fireworks. While amusing (in retrospect), it didn't exactly encourage trust in those I had assumed to be my night watchmen.
Going on through the year I see now much has changed -- and is changing. The schoold was attacked and evacuated (in my absence). It's hard to see change. There's been many painful times, trials, and obstacles. And yet it's beautiful.
I'm looking forward to next year when I can look back at all that will have happened this year. Life is truly an adventure! "We've nothing to fear for the future, except we forget how God's led us in the past."
So I'm sitting here with this tiny, ragged and only half-dressed child in my arms, hoping for great things this new year. I want to be able to see precious kids, like this one, healthy and clean, with food in their bellies enough clothes to keep them warm, and roofs over there heads.
God, help me to not lose focus. Keep my eyes fixed on the goal. Sometimes it feels as though this work is just a needle lost in a haystack, and it is... But You even notice when a little bird falls. Help me to remember that...

(Started in ER and finished later.)

Moving

2009-12-30T21:16:00.000-08:00

It's looking right now like I will be moving soon. We're finding a village up in the mountains that I can use as my outpost for medical work. We'll see what opens up. This is exciting as we've been wanting to spread out more with the work. There's thousands of dirt poor little villages up in the mountains filled with refugees. Many of them have really no way whatsoever to get any kind of medical care.
The next two weeks will be busy ones! It's my goal to be able to read Karen by then, do more language learning, and I'll also possibly be making a trip up to Chiang Mai for medical supplies.

Christmas

2009-12-28T00:12:00.001-08:00

Merry Christmas, everybody - nice and late!:)
I had a good, if not very Christmasy one. Got up early, made another delectable (not!) rice and curry breakfast. Some of my family left early to take some patients to the hospital in the refugee camp. Took care of a few patients. Did several motorbike trips into Mesolite for bags of rice and baby clothes for people who didn't have any. Went to pick up my sister in Methawa (about 20 minutes away). Did some Christmas shopping at a few little shops and used the excuse of the day to celebrate with ice cream with Em. Went down to the creek to rinse out laundry and while at it sang Christmas carols under the blazing sun (90 degrees indoors!). Came back up only to debate with the guys over the banana cake that'd be gotten up in Chiang Mai for a treat. We must have spent the next 20 minutes discussing how to divide it.:) And so forth, so on... Was a good day! But if or when I get back to the States I will have a Christmas, even if in July!:)

Patients and Patience...

2009-12-15T18:44:00.000-08:00

Here comes my long-delayed blog. I haven't been as good at keeping things updated as I hoped to. Somehow time just seems to slip away and whatever I wanted to say seems kinda outdated by the time I get around to actually writing it down.

Last week we went up to Chiang Mai (about a 7 hour drive or so from our house). We've been having mechanical difficulties with our vehicles which has really been creating some difficulties with the medical work so we had to go up and try to fix things. At the same time they were holding a media seminar up there (something I've always wanted to do) that I was able to attend. I discovered that as much as I like computers and cameras, I don't like staring at them all day.:) It was great training though!
Monday I came down by minibus together with a friend ahead of my family. Then by surprise a couple of the guys came and picked us up on motorbikes in Mae Sariang. Now that's a fun road to ride!:) It's got it all - about 3 hours of good road, bad road, and worse road, together with pincurves and many a hill.:)
So here I am back on the border. I've been keeping busy doing patient care again. Sometimes it's quite slow, but other times you're doing just to find time to brush your teeth in the morning. We've got so many pediatric patients. Just a guess, but I think I could say that probably 80+% of them are either babies or small kids. Yesterday I a took 4-month-old into the hospital that was having pretty severe breathing difficulty. He ended up having bacterial pneumonia. Today we took in 2 more. A one and two year old. One of them was just recovering from measles and really didn't look good. That's the first time I've seen skin "tenting" in real life. She was acting very lethargic and I considered her to be an urgent patient. We have to stick with the patient in the hospital to make sure that the doctor actually carefully evaluates the patient. Often they will just look at one thing and make their diagnoses just because they're so busy, rather than taking all the symptoms into consideration. For example, almost everyone that comes in complaining of stomach pain comes out diagnosed with gastritis. Just as a rather hilarious anecedote, my mom went in because she was having some trouble with her lungs and thought she might have pneumonia and the doctor diagnosed her with having an allergy to the cold. She thought better of informing him that she came from Montana.:) Anyways... On this one the doctor wouldn't believe that the patient was dehydrated or had measle complications. He diagnosed her with having just a common cold. So tomorrow we'll be taking them back to a different hospital.

Pics

2009-12-02T18:55:00.001-08:00

Josiah and one of little boys, Poketaw, thrilled after receiveing some warm clothes!

Josiah again with one of the older students, Gechawmai.

Some patients on the front porch.

Please forgive the descriptiveness of these pictures. I don't mean to be overly graphic, but this is what it's like here.

This is the little boy (we thought he was a girl) on the far right in the above picture. He's 5 and has had this infection for 5 months. You can't even begin to imagine the pain...

....

2009-12-02T18:19:00.000-08:00

I ran out of time to finish this, so to be continued....
"This morning dawned cloudy in the borderlands between Thailand and Burma, but as the sun breaks through, the beauty is breathtaking; high, rugged mountains; thick green jungle; rich fertile valleys surrounding freeflowing rivers. The beauty is so exhilarating it nearly makes us forget why we are here. It seems almost impossible to believe that this apparent paradise is a place more like hell for hundreds of thousands of people around us. The conflict of emotions caused by the contrast between the beauty of the land and the enormity of the tragedy of the oppressed and displaced people nearby is made even more acute by another bittersweet contrast - the brutality of the regime which inflicts immeasurable suffering on countless suffering victims: dignity in deprivation; generosity in destitution and a love that transforms brutality into miracles of grace." (Taken from the book "A Land Without Evil")
I was thinking that I'm not sure everyone that reads my blog has a very good picture of where we really are and what we're doing. In the past I felt like I couldn't speak very freely due to safety issues, but, at this point, it isn't really a problem with where I'm staying right now. So I thought I'd give a little better explanation of where we are and the situation over here for those who are interested.

We're living in Thailand at the moment, right near the Burma (Myanmar) border. This map shows Karen State (inside of Burma - the white part) which is what we border.

At this time, we're mainly serving the Karen people, mainly the IDP (Internally Displaced Persons) here along the border on the Thai side.
Kawthoolei (Karen State), which literally means a 'land without blemish', has long been a land with mines and a killing field. The Karen people living in Burma have been forced to flee a military dictatorship. And, not only that, but the Burmese Army is set on exterminating the Karen (and all other ethnic minorities) as a people group. War and killing have been a regular part of their lives for the past 60 years, but they haven't given up. This is the longest lasting civil war in history. The KNU (Karen National Union) fights mainly only in self-defense. They don't want to fight, but this is what they are forced to do to protect their homes and families.
Karen State is a beautiful place where I have lived and worked before. They'd had the threat of attack for a while in the area I was in, but just recently (after I left - in June) the Burmese finally did attack, conquered the KNU and took over the area. We had to evacuate the Karen school that was over there (approximately over a hundred kids) and move them across the border into Thailand.
In the KNU's own words, they desire Kawthoolei to be a Karen State with the right to self-determination. They want all the people to be given democratic rights, politically, economically, socially and culturally. They want to have freedom and quality of all religions. Burma is, at this point, one of the least developed countries in the world. Incidentally, about 40% of the Karen are christians, while the remaining number are either Buddhist or Animist.
My family's living in a house right along the border (about 500 yds) right now. They're specifically doing medical work with the villagers nearby and also supporting and directing the school that was evacuated from Burma and is now located right next door.
To be continued...

"...To loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free... To deal they bread to the hungry, and to bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? When thou seest the naked that thou cover him..." Isaiah 58:7,8

Happy Thanksgiving!

2009-11-26T19:14:00.000-08:00

Last few days have been busy. Yesterday I stayed home to care for the villagers while most of the others went to the hospital in Maesot with several patients (generally a whole day project.) I did have a translator most of the time, thankfully! Looked in a sore mouth (quickly decided I was inept!), little girls with scabies, baby with diarrhea, a few women wanted there blood pressures taken, and did several malaria tests, among other things. Two little girls ended up with pf malaria so I got to give my first pills! That scares me. I don't take lightly to giving medications I don't know very well - especially to kids. But with the help of a few phone calls we got it figured out and it was good experience.
I've just recently learned of the possibilty of taking a 6 month medic course here. It's created for medics on the front lines, I believe, so it should be really great. I just have to have a little better grasp on the language first as it's taught in Karen. There's also a doctor here who I may be able to shadow to learn more.
Right now one of my biggest goals is to speak the language - Karen (pronounced as kurin) - fluently. I'm working on learning to read and write it. I forgot a lot of what I did know while I was back in the States and it was very discouraging to begin with, but most of it's finally starting to come back! It's such a huge handicap to not be able to speak. It's especially hard in Thailand as I speak next to no Thai. My total vocabulary basically consists of the words hello, thank-you, and vegetarian (truly vital!:) But I don't see myself learning a considerable amount of Thai anytime in the near future. Over here I'm not only illiterate, but, for all intents and purposes, most of the time might as well be deaf and dumb as well.:) It can truly be humbling at times, trust me...:)
But the possibilities are really exciting!
I'm in Maesot right now as we had to take a little boy from a nearby village to the hospital. I didn't even realize it was Thanksgiving 'til I got on the internet. Happy Thanksgiving everybody!:) I hope you guys are all having a great one and keeping in mind how blessed we really are!

Update

2009-11-23T00:27:00.000-08:00

Well I'm not quite sure just exactly what to say, but I figured I should put an update on here.:) Might be a bit dry though.
The jist of it is: Arrived in Bangkok. All is well. As I stepped out of the airport I think the first thing that really hit me was the heat. I was decked out in my jacket, of course, straight from the frigid airs of MT!:)
So we're finally back on the border. It's been rather crazy the last few days. Guess they expected me to come back as a doctor or something... Which they're slowly, but surely learning I'm not...
Sabbath was anything but restful! We ended up taking an interesting trip to the hospital with several sick kids. We had a young girl who was lying in the bed of the truck going between unresponsiveness or hyperventilating and in agony with spasms in her legs. We were driving at quite exciting speeds. Altogether there were seven of us back there. I was perched at the edge of one of the benches trying to keep my balance as another sick child was lying on the other part of the bench behind me and Thai driving always manages to add some pizzazz to anything!:) Let's just say that it was pretty exciting. She ended up having severe pf malaria.
The porch here at the house is having an almost steady stream of villagers and students especially in the mornings and evenings. This morning our nurse was gone at the hospital with patients, so it was just me and mama there. To sum it up, I spent most of it wielding wicked looking poking devices and jabbing them without mercy into innocent little fingers. No, actually we had people with all types and sorts of various maladies. But I had to do testing on several for pf malaria. I was at my wit's end. The test isn't one bit like our handy-dandy glucometers back home. Instead it has this hole you've got to somehow deposit the blood into and it's the frustration of my life. I was so tired of it and the next in line was a squirming, wailing little kid who quite obviously already had a well developed fear of needles. All I wanted to do was run and hide. Couldn't stand the idea of having to poke this one over and over. But I gave it a shot and that was the first (and last, so far!) one where the blood came out in a perfect drop and ventured into the hole in like manner. Felt like that was God's gift to me this morning when He knew I couldn't take much more.:)

2009-09-25T10:51:00.001-07:00

EMT training is finally finished. I am very greatful for the training and glad I came back for it. I leave for Thailand again on November 15.

:)

2009-04-21T08:47:00.001-07:00

Snow...

2009-03-10T10:33:00.000-07:00

First Impressions

2009-02-01T10:49:00.000-08:00

Written on 01/28/09

I'm writing this as I'm sitting in the Seattle airport waiting for the last leg of my trip to Kalispell.
I flew out of Chiang Mai. Goobyes to my family weren't any easier than I'd imagined them to be. From Chiang Mai I flew to Bangkok, had a layover there for a few hours, from there to Taipai, Taiwan, and then the long flight to Seattle (about 10 1/2 hrs.)
Flying in here about all I could do was gasp, "Wow!" when I looked out the window and saw over the edge of the plane wing billowing gray clouds and behind them JAGGED, SNOW-COVERED PEAKS, and topping it all a glowing orangy red-pink sunset (one of the bestest colors in the whole wide world!:) I'm afraid the two ladies sitting next to the window never did quite grasp what all the fuss was about.
Let me just say...it's a different world.
I wanted to find a place where I could use the internet, so I was sitting there trying to figure out exactly how I was going toaccomplish this when all of a sudden it hit me that - Duh! - I can actually talk to nearly anybody I want and they'll actually understand me -- quite the novel thought! It feels very weird to have almost all the people around me chatting away in English. I actually almost feel like I'm intruding on people's conversations when I walk by people who are talking, or when I hear someone on the phone.
I might also add that almost everyone around me (including myself, I suppose) looks quite "weird" (i.e. huge people, big noses, strange haircolors,...)
Anyways.. I'll soon by "home" (not quite sure where I think that is anymore...)! Can't wait to catch a glimpse of that fluffy white stuff that covers the ground, though I'm not quite as sure about the cold.:) I've come this far safely and had a reasonably uneventful flight -- God's good! I'll get back with you later...

More Pics

2009-01-25T05:27:00.000-08:00

These are just some miscelanious pictures of the school and kids I wanted to put up before this part of my life is past and gone.

First off, I'm going to mention that I wanted my format to be a bit different, but my computer's being a bit stubborn or something...

The biggest girl in the picture, Naw Paw Coo, is the oldest girl in Kindergarten. She's fourteen.

Let me introduce you to Dohpuhgloo! This little guy is just adorable. He's five-years-old.

When I first came to Lay Klo Yaw he was new there (he's GiGiThay and MooQheeLa's brother). He was a major challenge for me as he absolutely refused to talk. I honestly didn't know what to do as he refused to obey and answer at roll call or anything. Anyways, I was finally able to break through the ice and I wish you could have seen him then.:) Sometimes I was almost tempted to wish he was still quiet (not really!). He became my nearly constant little chatterbox companion. I wish you could hear his laugh! I don't think I've ever met a more affectionate little boy. He seemed like he was just starved for attention and I bet he was too. There was no one who paid him special attention or gave him hugs or anything. But once he opened up to me he would just beg for it. I'd have to say that 90+% of the time he was telling me he loved me, hugging and kissing me, or begging to be picked up -- but I loved it! He even began to call me mother sometimes (I really didn't know what to do about that)! He was definitely one of the biggest tugs on my heartstrings when I left.

Thought saluting was pretty cool or something.:)

Is that grin cute or what?:)

A few kids who came to say goodbye.

This is the kindergarten class taking a nap. You can't see all of them there, though. I thought it took resemblence to a battlefield or something. And quite honestly, it basically was trying to get them to stay put.;)

Namuda's a very special little girl.

The animals here have been really painful for me to see sometimes. These are some new puppies at the school. They're so cute, but I see all the wretched looking adult dogs around and I just hate to even think of what their going to become. They're devouring rice in the picture there.

One of the main forms of amusement is some type of rubberband game the kids play in the dirt.

One of the big boys, Saw Ha Gay, cut his head with a saw or something. Just one of the experiences that really made me with I was an EMT.

Relishing a snack of rice while sitting in an old worn-out suitcase.

Saying goodbye to one of the teachers, EhDohSay. I wasn't having near as much fun as it looks like, though.

More than a spoonful of love?

2009-01-21T18:21:00.000-08:00

"I think I'm going to cry when you leave." DeeEhNyay said softly. I was trying to absorb this news when to my further amazement he added, "I love you very much!" He'd barely finished saying as much before he ducked back around the corner of the entrance of the hut. It wasn't long before one of his unmerciful playmates gleefully announced, "DeeEhNyay haw (cry)! DeeEhNyay haw!" before dragging him back into the room.
Of course Nicholway, or Namuda, or GiGiThay might be found crying...but not DeeEhNyay. Or would he? It had never really occured to me that he would truly care if I would leave.
I should explain that DeeEhNyay is a very sweet, if, as I knew him, not extremely demonstrative, little boy. Most of the other kids are nearly perpetually hanging on me, sitting on my lap, holding my hands, and hugging and kissing me; but for the most part DeeEhNyay pretty much seems content and absorbed with his friends. Asides from the occasional smile he might throw my way, I really didn't have much interaction with him in comparison to what I had with the other kids. I think I'd pretty much settled on the fact that he was just one of those kids that would either take a long time or I would never get as close to.
"Yuh hih nuh (I give to you.)" he said pulling out his unwashed (in fact, it looked as if it might have missed quite a few washings!) spoon.
For you to understand exactly what significance a spoon as a gift could have, and a dirty one at that, you would have to understand more of the culture here.
To begin with, there's only been one time since I came here to the school that I've ever eaten with a spoon. That was when I was specially invited to a special service and meal with the soldiers. Besides that, it's, well, left to your very handy hands. Above that, DeeEhNyay's family is very poor. With some twelve children (from two different mothers) to feed and clothe I imagine it must be hard to scrape together ends meat. Both he and his little brother, DeeLwehSay, wear some of the most ragged clothes. I would never have expected his family to even own a spoon, much less for Dee Eh Nyay to give me one.

Believe me, that's one gift I have no intention of disposing of anytime soon.

Dee Eh Nyay's the one on the left.

Teacher --> Student

2009-01-21T18:14:00.000-08:00

So... I'm not a teacher anymore. I can't rightly decide whether I'm sad or glad. In fact, I'm descending back to student status again. Sounds amazingly inviting to just show up at classes, launge around in my desk chair, and study what I'm told to; versus trying to wrack my brain for new creative activities, spending my time dreaming up unconventional punishments, or panicking that I won't be able to fill up all of the time.
I left the school on Sunday night. Goodbyes were not easy. I didn't feel ready to leave at all. I'm just getting into the language, learning all the kids names and getting to know them personally and then I have to just pack up and say goodbye? I've really felt that the Lord's been opening up the doors for me to return. How to explain that to the kids was the hard part. I couldn't figure out how to tell them that I really do love them and want to stay with them, but feel that for now I'm supposed to be in the US getting more training. For several days Nicholway would intermittently burst into tears over my leaving. Some of the kids told me they would leave the school and a couple even claimed they would die if I left (not true, of course). Some of them would repeatedly ask every time they met me in their thin, dejected sounding little voices if I was going to America. It was truly heartwrenching at times. The morning before I left, Pockatow, forever the little man, came marching up and demanded as to whether I was going to America or not. When I sadly affirmed that I was, before strutting off, he drew himself up and declared with as much fierceness in his voice as he could muster (as best I can translate it), "My Maria go to America, I love not!" That one at least gave me a smile.
So, anyways... I'm in Chiang Mai with my family right now. I should be flying out sometime this next week. I don't know the exact date yet. It will definitely be an adventure! Afraid the goodbyes to my family are going to be even harder than they were to the kids though.

"My Kids"

2008-12-28T02:34:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to introduce you to a few of the kids in my classroom:

Guess what? I have a son (no raised eyebrows, please!):) No, that's actually just what some people like to call him, but he walked his way right into my heart! He adopted me and I couldn't help but adopt him! He's the light of my life here! Without question he's one of the sweetest little kids on the planet and, yes, I am admittedly probably prejudiced, but others agree with me too!

Papiya's got to be one of the cutest little kids in my class!

This little guy, DuLwehSay, is only four or so. He's got the cutest grin and some of the most ragged clothes. Whether you're trying to punish him or grinning back at him, he is forever smiling.

Moonapi's a little girl after my own heart! She has a pretty rough story, but I'm not sure about all of it yet. I love her laugh! I honestly thought she was a boy at first. In fact, it's very hard to tell with some of the kids. Probably about four or so cute little "boys" ended being girls.:) Moonapi recently had a severe case of malaria and had to have a blood transfusion.

Pockataw's very special to me! I think he's got the most little boy in him that I've ever seen in a little boy.:)

And then there's GiGiThay and her little sister MuQueeLa. They were recently given to the school. They had been living with their grandmother who is a drug dealer. I don't think I've ever met a big sister with a more cheerful or devoted spirit to her younger sibling. MuQueeLa is three, but I was surprised when I learned that. I would have guessed her to be much much younger. We think she was probably a little behind with her development due to a lack of stimulation, but daily she seems to act more and more like a three year old. She's really becoming a little chatterbox!

Pathaclaw's my little knight in shining armour!:)

This is the yougest kid that's been coming to school recently. I'm told he's two-years-old.

I think this one's Pa Day Day (still gotta finish learning all 40+ names!)

Eh Ta Coo is a very sweet little boy that happens to be the chief mischief of the classroom. When the millitary leader found him he was being kept in a cage. I've been trying to somehow get through to him. I was absolutely floored the other day when it looked like he smiled and waved at me from a distance. It's my goal to someday see him without that sad look in his eyes.

Merry (late) Christmas!!

2008-12-27T22:47:00.000-08:00

Hello, Friends!! A very late, very Merry Christmas to all of you!

I'm with my family for a couple days or so; so I get the major treat of internet access!!:)

Surprisingly, they do do Christmas here (not everyone, I don't think), but it's just different...and it does feel a bit weird to sing Jingle Bells while sitting under palm fronds and even stranger to hear strains of Silver Bells wafting out from another bamboo hut.:) But then I can't really complain as I always was the one to belt out The First Noel in July!

Have to admit to spending part of Christmas morning laying on my bamboo plastic mat staring up at the bamboo walls and leaf ceiling and picturing.... snow...Christmas trees...laughter...friends...food...and what all of you guys would be doing then...

In the evening I got to go see my family. As I'm sure you can image, that was a major spirit lifter as I hadn't seen them for several weeks. They had just moved into their new house that day so I got to spend the first night there with them. It really felt funny to have wood walls around me and glass in the windows. It's amazing how much a very simple wooden structure can feel like luxury after having only having been around bamboo. I think I'm going to have reverse culture shock going back to the States. Emily really outdid herself and put together a nearly regular Christmas dinner for us! Now that was a BIG treat after rice, vegetables, rice, and vegetables!:)

So...I hope all of you had a really really great Christmas....and I miss everyone extremely a lot.

A video of the kids singing. They can really sing! Sadly due to poor lighting you can't see much.

Our Christmas dinner!

Some Pics

2008-12-27T21:50:00.000-08:00

Just thought I'd put on a few pics of where I am right now.

The hut I live in!

This little guy happened to be part of my welcoming committee. He'd already taken up residence above my mat. I'll admit to sneaking a peak at him half-way through the first night, but it was more disconcerting having him vanish a few days later than having him up there.

I love the mountains. Unfortunately, due to them being peppered with landmines, I can't do much exploring though.

The kindergarten "classroom" I spend so much of my time in.

This is a semi-typical meal. It's always rice, but the vegetable dish varies. You see a spoon there, but such things are only used for serving...most of the time.:)

Cooking/dining area for the kids.

Not a whole lot more to the cooking facilities.

Update

2008-12-09T17:16:00.000-08:00

I admit to truly having been awful about keeping my blog updated, but I do sort of have an excuse as I really haven't had much internet access. So I thought I'd just basically try to give y'all an overview of what's going on. But at this point we've been here for nearly two months and so much has happened that I'm honestly at a loss for words as to how to tell it all, or even just a small part of it.

Right now I'm at a school teaching. Yes, you heard me right! I can just see those of you who know me smirking right now, but that is really what I'm doing.:) So I'm in charge of some 41 squirmy kindergarten kids ranging in age from about 2 to 14. I'm supposed to be keeping them happy and learning for several hrs a day in a small bamboo hut. We have no desks, no toys (besides coloring), no interpretor, and I can't even speak to them so they know what I'm saying beyond just a few simple sentences. It's the challenge of my life. But I'm really enjoying it and the kids are absolutely adorable and some of the sweetest little people you'll ever meet!

A few of "my" kids.

Quite Alive, I Insist!

2008-12-08T08:39:00.000-08:00

Some of you may have caught wind of the rumor that I'm very sick. I just wanted to clear up that I have been a bit sick, but not THAT sick. In fact, much to my chagrin, embarrassment, and amusement I was told that at one church it was announced that I was so sick I was near death and someone else said they were expecting to hear a funeral announcement. At the moment I was informed of the church announcement I happened to be eating quite heartily and having a great time. But that news probably worked out for my benefit as they say laughter is good medicine.:) But I really do appreciate the prayers and wanted to say thank-you to all who have been praying. I was sicker for a while and I don't know what it might have turned into if it hadn't been for the prayers. They took me to the hospital yesterday. The doctor said I do have a staph infection, but I'm sure it will be cleared up soon. So...I protest that I'm really quite alive still.

The Marketplace...

2008-11-12T21:27:00.001-08:00

Speaking of food... this is sort of a postscript to my last blog. Some pics I snapped between boughts of nausea at the marketplace.
Yes, people around here actually EAT these things.=0 I had I'm afraid congratulated myself to have bypassed the famous culture shock, that is until I went to a local market. How can I describe it? Follow me in your imagination, if you will, to a place where flys abide and nearly unbearable stenchs torment sensitive noses. Enter with me into a dark and dank roofed structure filled with tables of miscelanious and at times unrecognizable items known as food.

To be continued...someday........

Food?

2008-11-06T01:31:00.000-08:00

Written 10-23-08

Before coming over here, I really never was a fan of Thai food. It just seemed a bit authentic for my american palate. So I'm sorry to say that the food here hasn't always been an easy matter for me. On the other hand, it's a continual source of enthrallment for Mama and Emily. I had strong (and I'm afraid to say possibly founded) suspicions that that's one of the things that helped to lure them over here.=0 Honestly, all in all the food isn't as bad as I might have imagined it to be, though there has been times when I've seriously struggled to get it down. Sometimes the heat is a bit more than I can take. Even on occasion Mama and Emily have been unable to finish their food. Of course, Thailand does have a few rather peculiar things they consider to be delicacies. Take rats, for instance! Guess what? The meat's really "good." But, be warned, don't try any Bangkok rats. Further up north it's OK, 'cause they're "clean." Haha! They're bought by the kilo, just in case you were interested. And guess what I caught sight of in a civil looking store last night? Don't worry, I'm not going to keep you in suspense for long--Live toads. For eating, I assume!

How germ laden is the food we're eating you ask? Generally I try not to go there. But......as an exception (for your special benefit), I'll expound.

These are the general rules of thumb around here for when you go out to find some food from any of those quaint little rice shops along the road:

Don't look around. Just don't. Trust me, you don't want to! Don't look at the sewer in the gutter in front; don't study the refuse lying around; tune out the buzzing flys; don't worry as to the sanitary conditions of the counter, or, for that matter, the knife cutting the vegetables, or, most of all don't glance at the skim covering the brackish water they just used to wash the vegetables; don't dwell on the fact that the person cutting up your vegetables didn't use toilet paper when they last used the restroom; and, whatever you do, please, please don't investigate as to the source of that peculiar (may I say gross?) odor wafting around you; if you by chance out of the corner of your eye catch a glimpse of odd looking critters frying or waiting to be fried, quickly redirect your gaze elsewhere and don't even consider as to if your wonderful vegetarian food will come into contact with that same pot; don't allow your mind to linger on the (true) horror stories of the dishes not being washed with soap, or, worse yet, being washed in the sewer; don't worry, I'm not going to the drinking water... So, really, just don't - it's that simple! Don't look up, don't look down, don't look in front of you, to the sides, or behind you - they're by far the most dangerous. Maybe acting blind is the best option after all! They say that what you don't know won't hurt you...blissful ignorance is the best!:) Wanna come eat with me?=P

(Disclaimer: This could be slightly exaggerated for some places! Not necessarily all of said conditions are accumilated in one place, although that is sometimes the case.)

I caught sight of this dog taking it's morning beauty sleep up on one of the tables at a restaurant I passed. Simply had to snap a picture. Thought it quite fitting for this blog.:)

2008-10-19T17:20:00.000-07:00

This country has a way of making a poor american feel really...spoiled. Earlier this morning I was sprawled out in a wooden kick-back chair type thing with a fan blowing on me (the heat and humidity can make things quite miserable) listening to my ipod and feeling downright - spoiled (ouch).

Anyways...

Sabbath was very nice. We had sabbath school and church at the Griswald's house (they're some other missionaries in the area). There's a reasonable number of Thai people attending church. They translated most of what was said for us. Thai sounds like it would be very difficult to learn.
After lunch we went to a school where they're holding classes for the kids there. The kids are so cute! There was also an adorable cat at the school, but it was really skinny. It acted like it was starved for attention. There was a little down syndrome boy who was playing with it and basically hanging it from it's neck (until someone intervened.) The cat didn't even try to get away from him. It seemed to not care what was done to it as long as it was getting attention. The Griswalds took it home and are going keep it. I was so happy about that. It's hard for me to see a lot of the animals they have here. They're so uncared for.
Later in the afternoon, the Kiers took us to a type of sanctuary place for elephants! That's the first time I've ever seen an elephant in real life, except for maybe at a zoo or something when I was really small. They are huge! They had quite a few babies who were absolutely adorable. One of them apparently enjoyed chasing us and was big enough to keep some of us on the run. Some of the workers were riding the elephants. They were perched up on the elephants without any type of saddle or anything. The elephants will either lift up a leg for you to step on to get on or they will get down on their knees. We also got to follow them when they took a few of the elephants down to the river for a bath. I don't think the elephants look as big in the pictures as in real life. Really neat to see all that.

Yesterday the Kiers took us to Lotus (basically a Wal-Mart here in Thailand). This country can be so poor in some places and so high-tech in others. It's amazing.

Later we ate at a vegetarian restaurant. The owner of the restaurant was so sweet. She tryed to talk with us and Mrs. Kier told us that she was asking Mama to give her one of us kids. Lol! She asked several times. I'm not sure if she was really serious or not. After Mama's refusal, she finally settled on telling Mrs. Kier that she was going to pray that God would give Mrs. Kier five children and that then Mrs. Kier would give her one of them. She kept holding up one finger and reapeating, "Just one, just one." in Thai.:)

We're leaving on the train at 4:00 this afternoon for Chang Mai. That will be a first for me. I've never been on a train before. Sounds exciting, but a bit long - 12 hrs.:)

I'll get back with you later.

We're here!

2008-10-17T03:49:00.000-07:00

Warning: This is LOONG. If you don't have time, don't attempt to read it. I had too much to say to even try to condense it.:-)

We're in Thailand right now! It's almost hard to believe, even when I'm looking at my surroundings. We flew into Bangkok around midnight on Thursday (this time - we're about 13 hrs ahead of you guys in MT). It was a long flight. We left at (this is all approx.) 6:20 from Kalispell on Tuesday morning, flew to Seattle where we had about a 6 hr layover, from there it was 11 hrs to Tokyo, about a 45 min. layover and around 7 more hrs to Bangkok.
Things were crazy the last few days. It was very hard saying goodbye to friends. Monday night some of us never got any sleep just trying to do last minute things. We were supposed to be out of the house by about 2:30 a.m., but we weren't ready so we ended up dashing out the door around 4:00 or so. I did manage to somehow get in a cat nap part of the way to the airport. We were nearly frantic thinking we might miss the plane. An accident happened right in front of us while we were driving through Whitefish. We were so thankful it wasn't us. Arriving at the airport, some dear friends surprised us by being there. Poor people! some of them got up at 2:30 just to meet us and had waited at the airpor for us since 4:30. So sweet.
I just so happened to be one of those "special" people randomly picked my my airline for a more thorough inspection than anyone else.:/
When we arrived in Bangkok, a friend picked us up. We were so thankful to have someone with us to find a van for all our luggage, speak Thai, tell us where to go and what to do, ect.
We found a room for the rest of the night at a very nice hotel. We were really surprised by it. I hadn't expected to see anything that nice in Thailand, except for maybe a tourist resort. We only had to pay like 600 baht (maybe $16?) for it, though. Although it was after midnight here because of the time change and all I didn't feel like sleeping yet. Found solace in my guitar for a while. We were up around 4:00 a.m. and had to wait for another long 4 hrs until we could do anything. My guitar really came in handy again. I think I've played more in the last two days than I have in the last two months before that.:)
We headed out onto the street to look for a rice shop or something for breakfast. That's when things got more interesting. Believe me, it's a totally different story actually being out on a street than looking out of a fourteenth story window at a street. Looking out the window is like looking at a picture or watching any movie you see of a third world country, but when you actually get out on the street you have all the added effects - the sound and smell especially. Sometimes I even hesitated to take pictures because I felt that a picture could never adequately show things as they are. You guys have really already heard it all. There's not a whole bunch I could say that you haven't already somehow heard. But it's different when you actually are there. Of course anytime you go somewhere new there's surprises in that things are never exactly how you imagined them to be. But I have a pretty good imagination and I think for the most part can expect things to be worse than they end up being. We saw extreme poverty to extreme wealth all in one day. Walking the streets there was the aweful smell, dirty kids, sad looking people, and filth; but later on we went to a mall type thing we had never seen the likes of. It was incredible. And then Ben took us to -- Subway! Yes, the restaurant! I thought I'd eaten my last sub. Not so! No worries, that's not going to be our everyday fare. I guess, according to Ben, after you've been on a Thai diet for a while you start to crave those things. I can believe that.
The heat and humidity can be quite tiring. Mama suggested that we had had an "exhaust"ive walk. It's not uncommon in Bangkok to see people walking around with masks on their faces due to the pollution.
Piled back in a taxi for the trip across the city to our room. This time we had a, well, younger and more spirited driver. Poor Mama! She told us that she took comfort in the thought that God wouldn't have brought us to Thailand to die. At least one of us thought it was kind of fun.=) They drive on the opposite side of the road here. Someone said they drive like flowing water - meaning you go around whatever's in your way. I'd have to say that sounds pretty accurate.

Right now we up in Ayuttaya, about a 1 1/2 hr drive from Bangkok.

I think one of the hardest things for me so far would have to be the noise. I've been raised a country girl. The dogs next door intermittently howl (and I mean HOWL) away. Sometimes it dosen't seem quite so intermittent. It's 4:56 in the morning right now and the loudspeakers just came on blaring Thai music. We're told they're going to read the newspaper on there too. I guess they recently turned off the speaker that was right beside our friend's house.:]

We should be headed to Chang Mai by Monday or so.

I'll put an update on later.

I have this fascination with plane's wings and the sky.

So beautiful, I think!:)

The long wait in Seattle.

Tired in Tokyo. 7 more hrs to go.

Getting rooms for the rest of the night.

The next morning. Jet-lag, if you ever saw it. Josiah must have slept like this for around 4 hrs while we made racket all around him.

This is the rice shop where we stopped.

That's breakfast, folks!:-)

One of the streetsweepers.

Bangkok

Yes, that's six of us piled into the back of a taxi!=0

There's the poor vehicle.

That place was almost indescribable.

Had to document it.

Doing it again. Poor Emily's looking a bit smushed.

Times ticking...

2008-10-08T18:42:00.001-07:00

One week - yesterday!